


champagne problems

by johnyongclub



Series: champagne problems [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Fingering, Barebacking, Best Friends, Blow Jobs, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Grinding, Happy Ending, Hook-Up, Love Confessions, M/M, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:01:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29463939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/johnyongclub/pseuds/johnyongclub
Summary: It was Johnny's brilliant idea to get a matching tattoo when they were half drunk, at a stupid frat party because studying wasn't an option, and Taeyong's mood swings were getting intolerable even Johnny couldn't handle it. Yes, yes, it was his idea to get tattooed, but it was Yuta who made the pact.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Series: champagne problems [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2189079
Comments: 40
Kudos: 297





	1. One.

**Author's Note:**

> hello, im back with another smutty johnyong, as expected... this will come in three parts! so just a mini chaptered fic for you guys. happy reading!

It was Johnny's brilliant idea to get a matching tattoo when they were half drunk, at a stupid frat party because studying wasn't an option, and Taeyong's mood swings were getting intolerable even Johnny couldn't handle it. Yes, yes, it was his idea to get tattooed, but it was Yuta who made the  _ pact. _

Yes. The pact. The infamous 95Line (their stupid group name their other age friends knew them as) pact that was made known to almost the entire campus when Yuta so brilliantly told their friend Haechan, whose big mouth couldn't be paid to keep quiet. 

See, the problem was that, while he was (half) drunk, he'd been sober enough to know what matching tattoos would mean. He had known Yuta and Taeyong since high school and no one else had felt like family like they do, so he knew he wouldn't regret getting that '95' inked onto his skin. Besides, it would also give him a reason to have some sort of physical evidence that he has a bond with Taeyong, who he had been secretly crushing on for  _ ages. _

Then Yuta, lovely, lovely Yuta, had to come up with a pact. A pact that sealed them as  _ brothers,  _ meaning no catching feelings, no kissing, and strictly no hooking up, with each other, erasing every and any chance Johnny had with Taeyong. A smart man would have denied the pact.

Johnny had never been the smart one.

And because Johnny isn't the smartest one out of the three, the first thing he did when Yuta went back to Japan for spring break was to drag Taeyong to Jaehyun's house party. His excuse had been that he wouldn't have a drinking buddy if he went alone, despite the fact that their entire friend group would be there, but Taeyong didn't need much convincing. 

"You brought the ice prince!" Haechan yells right into Johnny's ear, causing him to flinch away and frown when the younger male laughs. 

He hooks an arm around Johnny's shoulders, free hand gesturing at Taeyong, who isn't even pretending to listen to whatever Doyoung is telling him. "Do you think he'll say more than two words to us tonight?"

"Don't hold your breath!" Johnny shouts over the music, laughing as he shrugs Haechan's arm off. 

It really isn't a surprise that Taeyong is so quiet. He finds it rather amusing that people still can't believe Taeyong barely says anything, even though he attends parties like this one. He isn't cold per se, but he doesn't have much fucks to give, and because of that, Taeyong often doesn't react to most things. Like now, with Doyoung talking, Taeyong is seated next to him, staring into his red cup of cheap beer.

He's wearing the white dress shirt he doesn't bother buttoning up fully, leaving the first and last two unbuttoned, exposing a little too much skin that affects Johnny personally. His dyed silvery purple hair had grown out just a tad, fringe constantly falling over his eye, but he'd kept his undercut trimmed. His expression is blank. Johnny thinks it's fucking sexy and if he gets too drunk, he might make a lovely mistake. 

He might leave marks on Taeyong's skin. He wonders how mad Yuta would be if he finds out Johnny broke the pact.

Shaking the train of thoughts away, because he isn't drunk enough to entertain them, he tears his gaze away from his best friend and heads towards the living room, where an already drunk Jaehyun is laughing, standing on the top of his parents' coffee table and swaying just a little.

"He says he's going on abstinence," Mark says to keep Johnny up to date once he notices Johnny has joined them. He's grinning, the little half smile he wears only when he's tipsy. "I'm gonna bet a hundred bucks he's not gonna make it through the week."

Johnny scoffs, "I'd say through tomorrow. No way he's saying no if Doyoung even bats his lashes at him."

Mark barks out a laugh and he abandons Johnny to go over to Lucas, whose arm immediately wraps around his shoulders. Johnny forgets sometimes that they fuck occasionally and wonders just  _ how  _ they do it without entirely ruining their friendship. Are there feelings involved? Because Johnny's pretty sure he's lowkey in love with Taeyong.

"Johnny!" Jaehyun calls out from on the table, steadied by the hand Taeil has around his elbow so he doesn't fall off. "Johnny, my man, you believe me, don't you?"

Everyone has their attention on Johnny now, some lingering gazes by girls he recognized, some amused smiles from guys who know of Johnny Suh, one of the three boys of 95Line. Johnny raises his red cup to Jaehyun, "Don't make promises you can't keep, Jeong."

This has people laughing and fake-booing Jaehyun, who laughs at Johnny's lack of faith in him. Johnny's smiling as he watches Jaehyun struggle to step off the coffee table, stumbling onto the couch and mumbling something about someone being an exception. On any other occasion, Johnny might feel sorry for him. His breakup with Doyoung couldn't have been easy.

"What are they on about now?" Taeyong's lazy voice finds Johnny and he turns to find his best friend next to him. His gaze scans the area, taking in the sight of everyone dispersing since Jaehyun is done with his big news. "The party's getting boring. Either we get fucking wasted or we're out, John."

Johnny has to quickly swallow his beer to stop Taeyong from walking off, fingers curling around the male's thin wrist to keep him in place. "Wait, wait. I'm sure some people are up for a game, or something. There's literally nothing else to do at home."

Taeyong shrugs, "We could fuck but suit yourself."

Johnny chokes. He chokes and has to spit up his beer a little bit but when he looks at Taeyong, the shorter male is laughing, clapping Johnny on his back and then walking away. Cruel, Johnny thinks. He probably is an ice prince, like everyone says he is. If Johnny doesn't know any better, he'd think Taeyong is unreachable.

But he does know better; he had seen nights where Taeyong would lay his head on his lap while they watched a movie with Yuta at his feet, where Taeyong would look at him with wide eyes whenever he got too lazy to get out of bed and wanted Johnny to get him food. He had seen Taeyong in the ways no one else has and maybe that's why he caught feelings. 

He's not too sure if that was stupid or brave.

The former seems to make more sense, especially with the way he follows Taeyong like a puppy. Taeyong places his refilled cup down on the table when they reach their group of friends, taking his place next to Doyoung and gesturing for Johnny to sit next to him. To the rest, he says one word. 

"Game."

Jungwoo is first to speak, "Truth or drink!"

"Dare or drink!" Haechan protests.

"No, that's boring," Jungwoo frowns, "Dares are boring. Truths are thrilling. You can't tell the truth, you drink."

Haechan rolls his eyes but he seems to agree when he calls for Mark and Taeil to join. Jaehyun is out cold on the couch and Lucas doesn't want to play, which is a shame; Johnny had wanted to pry some honesty out of him and Mark. 

Since Jungwoo had suggested it, he sets the game to start with Taeyong, a move Johnny knows Jungwoo took on purpose because to everyone else, Taeyong is a big book of mystery with a magical lock only Johnny and Yuta have access to. Johnny thinks it's kind of funny because Taeyong is really just a small little cat who secretly loves cuddling and warm things.

"First question," Haechan starts, that same teasing smile on his lips, "Have you ever crushed on any of us? Truth or you're gonna have to drink."

Johnny watches as Taeyong watches them, and then, after a beat, he picks up the cup and takes a large gulp. Johnny is almost offended by how much he's drinking so he doesn't have to answer them. Is it a yes? A no? Has he had feelings for one of them and not told Johnny? 

Jealousy is green and feels like an ugly monster in his chest.

The game continues around the group. After Taeyong is Doyoung's turn, then Jungwoo, Haechan, Mark and Taeil. Mark tells the truth about having multiple sexual partners but Johnny's pretty sure he wouldn't have been so honest if he wasn't already tipsy.

When his turn came, Johnny's a little nervous. He's partly glad he hadn't been drinking too much to pull a Mark and possibly out himself in front of the very person he isn't ready to confess to but he's also scared of what Haechan would ask. The boy's a little monster when it comes to people's misery.

"Johnny, Johnny, Johnny," Haechan says dauntingly, disregarding any formality but Johnny lets it slide. "I've got a pretty spicy question. Out of the three of you in 95Line, besides yourself, who would you kiss?"

_ Taeyong, obviously,  _ but Johnny scoffs like it's the most ridiculous question. "Not Yuta because I heard he's all tongue. That's kinda gross considering he's like my bro."

"So Taeyong then?" Haechan prompts.

Johnny glances over at Taeyong, whose eyes are wide and looking at him. His cheeks are dusted pink under the light, clearly from the alcohol he'd consumed and Johnny has the strongest fucking urge to kiss him. He's so fucked.

He shrugs, clearing his throat. "Sure, why not?"

Taeyong picks up his beer and downs the rest of it. Johnny does the same. The game continues. 

By the time they finished about five rounds of this stupid game, Taeil is the only one who's still somewhat sober. Haechan is laughing that high-pitched giggle into Jungwoo's shoulder, probably over how funny-looking their hands look on top of each other. Doyoung is passed out next to Taeyong and Mark excuses himself to go find Lucas. 

Johnny can't say he's sober himself, especially with how heavy his head feels at the moment, but he's feeling bold and brave and when Taeyong's pinkie brushes his own, Johnny dares a look up into his big, brown eyes. They look like bobas. 

It's like Taeyong doesn't know how to  _ act;  _ he looks part soft, the way he looks within the walls of their shared place, but he's also trying to keep up that cold front he likes people to think he is. Eventually, he rises to his feet and Johnny watches as he stalks off, longing pathetically for a boy out of his reach.

He should have looked away, because when Taeyong stops by the bottom of the staircase, he turns and meets Johnny's gaze. Getting caught staring is embarrassing enough, except Taeyong doesn't look annoyed or pissed off and he doesn't have that blank expression he usually has. 

He looks almost… shy. Is Taeyong capable of being shy? He's always been bold and brave and cool, an admirable person Johnny wishes he could be like. Now even in the distance, Johnny could see his pink cheeks. His eyes are asking and it takes Johnny a moment to read what exactly his question is.

_ Oh my god.  _

As soon as he realizes what Taeyong is asking, Johnny is up on his feet, which might have been a mistake because his head is spinning and he's swaying but he recovers quickly. He follows after Taeyong, who is already climbing up the stairs, his own legs almost failing him. 

Johnny vaguely remembers thinking that this, out of many other things he'd done, might cut the cake. 

Taeyong finds the nearest empty room, which is probably Jaehyun's sister's room, so Johnny's glad he won't be around when she finds out Jaehyun had let strangers into it. Not that Jaehyun is aware, since he's still passed out downstairs. 

As soon as the door closes, the first thing Johnny does is to flash Taeyong a toothy grin, because it feels like the right thing to do. Plus, it's not like Johnny could control his face muscles when it comes to Taeyong. He finds he couldn't really control much of anything when it comes to Taeyong.

"Said you'd kiss me," Taeyong finally speaks up, his voice slurring just a little bit, his cheeks pink and brown eyes glassy. He's  _ drunk,  _ but so is Johnny. "So kiss me."

Johnny's lips part and he should just kiss him but instead he asks; "What about the pact?"

Taeyong makes a disgruntled noise in the back of his throat before he backs Johnny up against the wall, their mouths just inches apart. "Yuta uses too much tongue."

It makes zero sense but honestly, Johnny would take anything as an excuse to kiss Taeyong, so he surges forward and lets his mouth do the work. He kisses Taeyong.

Johnny is kissing Taeyong.

It's nowhere near innocent and all the way filthy and hurried; Taeyong chases after his lips whenever Johnny has to pull back for air and he greedily licks into Taeyong's sweet, sweet mouth, taking everything he could. It almost feels like a dream but Taeyong's wandering hands remind him he isn't sleeping. He's awake, and his best friend is fumbling with the button of his jeans and panting into his mouth like a needy, cock-starved kitten and  _ god,  _ Johnny's going to die.

"Wait, wait, wait," Johnny pants, because he's not in his right mind and he knows he wants this but he doesn't know if Taeyong wants it or if Taeyong would regret it. "Are you- Are you sure?"

Taeyong is dazed, staring at his mouth instead of into his eyes as he nods. "Yes. I wanna suck you off. I've been thinking about it all night."

"All night?"  _ Whoa. _

"Mhm," Taeyong hums and then he giggles, the little soft sound he makes whenever he knows they're alone so no one else could hear him. He sways a little bit, getting down onto his knees as his hands do a marvelous and skilled job of pulling Johnny's jeans down and off his hips. "Was thinking about it when you asked what else would we do at home. But you're not so… Whatever. I want your cock."

He probably wouldn't have been offended if Taeyong indirectly called him stupid but as of the moment, all he knows is that Taeyong was thinking it even before he was drunk and now here they are. 

He's rock hard and his mind is reeling and as soon as Taeyong curls his spit-covered fingers around him, Johnny is a goner. He's ruined, he thinks. Taeyong has ruined him and he hasn't even moved his hand. No one would be able to top this.

Watching as Taeyong spits onto the tip of his dick, Johnny releases a sharp gasp when the smaller male starts using his lips to mouth at the fat tip. His fingers bunch up the front of his shirt to keep it from blocking his view and stand in the way of Taeyong trying to suck the soul out of him.

The sight is almost overwhelming; Taeyong looks like he's meant to be on his knees, his sharp collarbones on display and hooded eyes staring up at Johnny. He slicks him up so much that he's coated with his spit and then Johnny gets the pleasure of watching Taeyong close his mouth around his cock and lowers his head all the way down until his nose presses below Johnny's navel.

"Holy fuck-" Johnny grunts, pleasure shooting up every ends of his nerves and he has to grasp onto a lock of Taeyong's hair to keep himself from thrusting forward, as if it helps. He's panting, muttering apologies that Taeyong ignores in favor of bobbing his head, sliding his mouth along Johnny's cock.

It's so hot. He doesn't think it comes close to how he'd imagined this would be, but then again all the material he's had to work with when picturing Taeyong's mouth around his dick was his own pathetic hand. This is the real thing and every time he tries to jack it off is gonna fall short. 

Taeyong pulls off with a lewd pop and a gasp, strings of spit and precum hanging between them and seeping down his chin. His lips are swollen and pink and he looks up at Johnny with a sly smile. "Wanna fuck my mouth?"

It's not like Johnny's going to say no. He cusses low under his breath and pulls his shirt up over his head to toss aside. Pride blooms in his chest when Taeyong's eyes widen at the sight of his abs and the glistening cock that slaps against his abdomen. It's good to know those exhausting hours at the gym finally pays off and he's always known he's bigger than most guys. So he'd like to think he'd ruined Taeyong too.

"You're so fucking hot," Taeyong murmurs just loud enough for Johnny to hear and he laughs because it's funny that Taeyong thought to say this after he was gagging on his cock. 

He strokes his length a few more times before his free hand curls around Taeyong's jaw. "Open up."

Taeyong visibly squirms and Johnny has a fleeting thought to bend him over and fuck him into the mattress but he doesn't know if Taeyong would want that, or that he could stop himself from cumming all over the boy's face. So instead he slaps the heavy tip over Taeyong's plush lower lip, watching as the pair parts and Johnny sinks into his throat in a smooth glide. Johnny sees heaven and heaven has a lot of stars.

He moans as Taeyong's tight throat wraps around his girth, could feel it slide down against his fingers that are curled under Taeyong's jaw and he pulls out just to push it back down, keeping up with the pace until Taeyong whines in protest. Johnny picks up the pace then, snapping his hips forward and fucking into the smaller's channel. 

Taeyong chokes around the thick shaft, eyes rolled back as Johnny pumps into his throat and Johnny has half the mind to stop but Taeyong is moaning, drooling and he isn't asking Johnny to stop so he doesn't. He continues.

"Fuck, I'm close-" Johnny gasps out, his thrusts growing sloppy and he starts to pull away but Taeyong whines, meeting his gaze and the pleading look in his eyes nearly pushes Johnny over the edge. 

His orgasm comes in crashing waves and Johnny throws his head back as he cums down Taeyong's throat, his moans coming in a drawn out string as he pumps his load and rides out his orgasm. It's mindblowing and he thinks he'd pass out if he hadn't seen how sexy Taeyong looks swallowing his load.

He's panting once he's finished and he pulls out his softening cock to watch Taeyong lick over his lips, cleaning off any remnants of his release. He tucks his dick back into his jeans and crouches down onto his knees before Taeyong, much too aware of the way his best friend's own cock is straining against his jeans. 

"You wanna-" Johnny's voice breaks from all the moaning he was doing. He clears his throat, making a blind gesture with his hand. "Uh, want me to help with that?"

Taeyong looks down at his own crotch as if just realizing that he's hard. He groans, like having a hard on is a liability, but Johnny watches as he unzips and tugs his cock out of his briefs. It isn't the first time Johnny had seen Taeyong's sizable dick but it's the first time he'd seen it this hard and red. 

Johnny's staring, thinking of ways he could help Taeyong get off but eventually Taeyong says, "Can I ride your thigh?"

Johnny's own dick might have twitched in his jeans but he nods and Taeyong doesn't waste time straddling his strong thigh. The position isn't ideal, seeing as he's on the floor instead of on a chair, which would have made it easier, but Taeyong is desperate. 

He watches, mesmerized, as Taeyong leans back onto his palms and begins grinding against Johnny's thigh. It's the hottest fucking thing and Johnny's post orgasm, drunken brain isn't able to process the fact that this isn't his fantasy.

His hands curl around each of Taeyong's hips to help him when he starts to slow down, presumably tired, obvious from the whines he lets out. He guides the rolls of his hips until Taeyong is gasping, cock rubbed raw against Johnny's jeans and he'd probably regret it later but right now his hips are stuttering and then he's cumming, staining Johnny's pants and collapsing into his arms where he buries his face into Johnny's neck as he calms down from his high.

Johnny's drunk. He's so drunk he thinks he might have kissed Taeyong's hair when his arms go around his smaller figure. At least he didn't confess, right?

That would have been a total nightmare.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Johnny doesn't think he looks bad. He's not conceited but he works hard to look the way he looks and it's always nice to know someone out of every corner he turns would take a double look at him, and some bold ones would even come up to flirt or ask for his number. He isn't a stranger to strangers, too bad he's only had eyes for Taeyong. 

With spring break over, Yuta is back and everyone's classes had started again. They don't speak of what happened that night at the party and it hasn't been awkward or anything, though that's probably thanks to the fact that Taeyong rarely speaks and most of the time doesn't have anything significant he wants to tell them. He remembers, at least, which Johnny is thankful for. He couldn't imagine how bad it'd feel if Taeyong couldn't remember what happened.

There's also the fact that they were supposed to be true to the stupid friendship pact Yuta came up with, so speaking of it isn't exactly an option. So far, no one seems to have noticed that they disappeared to hook up that night. 

It's rare that he'd have the same break time as most of their friend group, but currently Yuta is seated next to him, mumbling something about not getting enough sleep and picking at his lunch, while Jaehyun sits opposite Mark, laughing over whatever Mark is showing him on the phone.

Today, a different girl is sitting in front of Johnny, someone from one of his classes whose name is Gia, and she's trying to talk to him into going to a party with her. He's considering going but likely with Yuta and Taeyong instead of her.

"It'd be fun," She says, smiling and giving him heart eyes as a finger twirls her hair. "We can get to know each other. You're single, right? I'm single. Maybe we'd hit it off. And like, I'm not even talking about anything serious..."

Johnny parts his mouth to speak, knowing what exactly she's asking, and actually considering it because he's a  _ man _ and he's a single man even though his heart kind of already belonged to someone else. But Taeyong beats him to it.

"You're in my seat," Taeyong says, his voice cold and sharp and his expression bored, lunch tray in his hands. "Move."

Gia frowns up at him, "I don't see your name on it. There are empty seats there. Can't you see I'm talking to Johnny?"

Johnny thinks that's pretty stupid, talking back to Taeyong when the obvious thing you should do is exactly what Taeyong is telling you to, but he watches instead of saying anything. Taeyong stares at her, unmoving.

"I don't think I give a fuck whether or not you're done talking," Taeyong finally says. "I said, move."

"You're an asshole," Gia says, standing up with a huff. "There's a reason nobody likes you."

Taeyong simply stares at her and when he still doesn't budge, she huffs again and walks off. When she's gone, Taeyong takes her seat and bites into the apple that's always on his tray. Yuta cackles and Mark and Jaehyun resume their conversation. Johnny's just a little dumbfounded.

Don't get him wrong; he thinks it's so fucking sexy that Taeyong doesn't give a shit that people don't like him, but his brain is circling around the fact that Taeyong might have been  _ jealous.  _ He should probably shake that thought away.

"What was that all about?" He asks, casually despite the way his heart is racing, running his fingers through his short blond hair so Taeyong can't see his fingers tremble.

Taeyong lifts his gaze and meets his, "You wanna fuck her?"

"No?" Johnny chokes out, huffing out a scoff. 

"Then no problem," Taeyong leans back, holding his gaze as he takes a gulp of water from the bottle, in the way that gives Johnny the perfect view of his adam's apple bobbing when he swallows. 

Johnny adjusts his pants. Taeyong's totally doing it on purpose. If Johnny wasn't sure before, the half smirk on Taeyong's lips confirms it.

"Did something happen during spring break?" Yuta asks, to Johnny's horror, looking between the two of them. "It's like something shifted. Did any of you knock up some girl?"

Taeyong rolls his eyes and Johnny laughs, "No fuck, man. We partied. That's all. The usual. Jaehyun's on abstinence."

Jaehyun groans at this but Johnny's intention to have Yuta's focus stray somewhere else worked out perfectly because Yuta's eyes widen and he turns to grill Jaehyun about it. Johnny finds Taeyong's gaze once again and Taeyong is staring at him, like he knows Johnny is sporting a fucking boner for him, and it's almost embarrassing.

Except Taeyong gestures with his chin for Johnny to follow and he follows because it's a little too late to tell himself that casually hooking up with his best friend might be a mistake. 

Taeyong brings him to the abandoned showers behind campus and he has Johnny's back pressed against the wall as he pumps Johnny's cock with his fist. Johnny mirrors the act, and they both make an absolute mess, but all that matters is Taeyong's hot breaths on his cheeks smell sweet and addicting and something like a drug Johnny won't be able to resist.

He's doomed. He doomed beyond hell.

  
  


* * *

  
  


They start hooking up constantly; never going all the way but Taeyong makes sure Johnny gets off each time they hide away from their friends to make out. There are touches, lots and lots of touches, and Taeyong feels hot and fitting in Johnny's hands. He thinks he might go crazy if they stopped.

The challenge in that is keeping it a secret from their friends. It isn't that he thinks they would judge them, but there's something dishonorable about breaking a pact he'd sealed with his supposed brothers, even though it wasn't his idea and Yuta was kind of cruel for creating it. 

He thinks it's especially cruel when the urge to show Taeyong off to everyone is stronger, like right now, while he sucks red marks into Taeyong's neck, the pale expanse now littered with his markings. They should probably talk about boundaries but Johnny finds it hard to stop when Taeyong's breathing is rapid against the top of his head and it hitches in his throat every time Johnny nips at a sensitive spot.

"These are gonna be a bitch to cover up," Taeyong murmurs out as he gently shoves Johnny's face away so he could button up his dress shirt for once, turning around to look in the mirror. "What the fuck am I supposed to tell them?"

Johnny's hard in his jeans but he knows they don't have the time. Yuta's already waiting downstairs and they only got to slip away from the group because Haechan was making a fuss about spilling beer all over his favorite shirt. Yuta had driven them to the party and they wouldn't have a ride back to the apartment if Yuta left them behind. 

"So don't cover them," Johnny says casually, taking over the mirror so he could put his hair back into place and wiping at his mouth as if it would erase the evidence of their secret. He glances over at Taeyong, taking a moment to let his boner die out. "Unless you wanna tell them I'm the culprit?"

He has the decency to smirk at Taeyong and earns himself the middle finger though the twitch of Taeyong's lips tells him Taeyong isn't really mad. Taeyong inspects the hickeys on his neck and clavicle, cursing under his breath before he heads towards the door. He turns back to Johnny before he steps out, "You go first. If they ask, you don't know where I am."

Johnny beams and he takes a few long strides to the door but steals a kiss onto Taeyong's lips before he leaves the room. 

Downstairs, Yuta is searching for him with an arm around Mark's waist, holding the younger up and Johnny could tell he's nearly out cold. Mark is never not drunk when he's at these parties anyway, so it doesn't surprise him. 

"Where the fuck were you?" Yuta asks, no real bite to the question though he does look a little frustrated. "Where's Taeyong? I'm gonna head out. Mark's crashing at ours because there's no way in hell I'm driving him to his."

Johnny shrugs, pretending to look around for Taeyong as well and he thinks his acting is going pretty good when he acts surprised seeing Taeyong come down the stairs. "Yuta's heading out now. Where've you been?"

Taeyong stares at him like he's stupid but doesn't say anything until Haechan stops them from leaving. "Wait- Are those hickeys? Lee Taeyong, have you been hooking up with someone?"

"I don't see how that's any of your business," Taeyong says casually, cold gaze not doing anything to deter Haechan.

Haechan laughs and he goes off saying something about Taeyong finding someone he'd let touch him. Johnny has half the mind to admit that it's _ his  _ work of art but he thinks saying such things would make Taeyong want to break his legs. So he refrains.

Yuta quirks a brow up at Taeyong but he doesn't linger long enough to ask, turning around and helping Mark out of the house. Johnny meets Taeyong's gaze and is met with a glare. 

"My neck is off limits," Taeyong says through gritted teeth as they both step out onto the porch, following Yuta to his car.

Johnny scoffs, "Sure, okay."

Later, back in their shared apartment, Johnny has to clamp a hand down Taeyong's mouth to keep his moans from waking both Mark and Yuta up as he sucks more hickeys into his neck, fingers of his free hand stretching him open and pulling him apart until he cums and stains his bedsheets.

Taeyong isn't pleased but in the morning, Johnny catches him admiring the art that paints his pale neck and Johnny tells himself Taeyong might like it as much as he does.


	2. Two.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They don't talk about it, but Johnny knows they should.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ch2 is up! im lowkey in love with champagne johnny so im actually considering starting a series for this universe... thoughts?

They don't talk about it, but Johnny knows they should.

It's been going on for two months now; hiding out in abandoned showers and pulling the other into empty rooms at parties so they could get a feel of each other. He's getting unhealthily addicted and not talking about it is making it dangerously easy for him to start believing it's more than just what it is; a couple of friends hooking up. 

Taeyong doesn't show any kind of signs that he has mutual feelings. He's quiet as usual and when their friends aren't looking, he would steal a kiss or two in the dark, always teasing, always wanting, always there. Johnny can't get enough. It's alarming how much he  _ needs _ Taeyong's touch.

Some parts of his brain are acutely aware that being each other's casual hook ups is not a good idea for his heart, but they've started and he finds it impossible to stop. When did this happen anyway? Why did Taeyong suddenly want him?

He has the thought that it was triggered by Haechan's question on who out of the three of them Johnny would kiss. His answer had obviously been Taeyong, with the reasoning that Yuta uses too much tongue for it to be okay between them. Clearly, that had given Taeyong the idea that Johnny would kiss him. Obviously? Johnny kissed him.

But that feels a little selfish, knowing he's had feelings for Taeyong for so long Johnny can't remember when it started. It also feels a little unfair, since Taeyong very obviously doesn't reciprocate. Or is it obvious really? Does he feel the same? See, Johnny would never know if they don't  _ talk. _

Yet each time he tries, Yuta would barge in to join them or Taeyong would pull him in to kiss and kiss and kiss until their mouths are numb and Johnny is breathless and there's nothing in his head but  _ Taeyong.  _

It's infuriating to say the least but he couldn't exactly complain when each time he doesn't start talking about it means he gets to kiss Taeyong a little longer.

"Why the long face?" Yuta asks one evening, dropping himself down on the couch next to Johnny and turning the TV on even though Johnny has his laptop open, clearly working on an assignment. "Want some?"

Johnny looks at the tub of popcorn and wonders what day it is and why Yuta is up for a movie night without Taeyong. "Is it movie night? It's Thursday."

Yuta shakes his head, popping popcorns in his mouth. "It's not. I just felt like watching a movie. Where's Yong?"

"Working on a project or something," Johnny shrugs, not wanting to think about Taeyong even though that's all he's been doing. "You're done with the essay?"

"I'm procrastinating," Yuta says casually before changing the subject. "Seriously though, what's gotten you so uptight? You're always on your bullshit."

Johnny frowns, returning his focus on his assignment. "I'm not uptight. I have deadlines."

Yuta seems to buy it because if he doesn't, it doesn't show. He picks this time to talk about Taeyong instead, because he probably wouldn't dare breathe his name if Taeyong was somewhere in his room. "You think Yong is seeing someone?"

Panic. His first thought is to panic, but then he remembers that Yuta doesn't know anything. They've never been caught by any of their friends. They're good with secrets. He clears his throat, deciding to keep his eyes on the laptop. "What do you mean? Like  _ date _ date? Don't you think he'd tell us?"

"That's what I thought," Yuta nods, chewing obnoxiously. "But like, he's quiet, right? And that's totally normal. He doesn't give a shit about a lot of things. But he's been weird quiet. Like he's hiding something."

It's oddly unnerving to be the something in question while sitting right here and listening to Yuta talk about Taeyong being secretive. Breaking the pact was only one of the many reasons why they are doing it in secret. There's also the fact that Johnny doesn't  _ know  _ if Taeyong would ever want them to be a thing, or if this would go on until Taeyong finds some guy he'd miraculously open up to. It could happen.

It would hurt pretty bad.

"I'm sure if he met someone, he'd tell us," Johnny says aloud and prays for silently. It would suck to have to find out the way Yuta would find out. "Taeyong trusts us the most."

Yuta hums, "But that's probably why he's hiding it from us. Maybe he's waiting for it to be serious before he brings it up. That could be it. What about you though? You seeing someone?"

"No." Johnny says a little too quickly, clearing his throat once again and repeating it, quieter this time. "No, I'm not."

The silence emanating from Yuta is nerve-wrecking and Johnny doesn't dare steal a look. Instead he stares hard at the word 'pressure' on the screen of his laptop, hoping the topic would move to something else and not the sole reason he isn't finishing the assignment that's due by the weekends.

Like his hero and savior, Taeyong walks through the front door with an unimpressed look on his face, his hair matted to his forehead and his clothes soaking wet. Johnny frowns and glances out the window to see that it's raining. He hadn't even noticed when it started.

"You didn't have an umbrella?" Johnny asks, getting up to his feet on instinct and not waiting for an answer before he goes to grab a spare towel. When he returns, he drapes it over Taeyong's shoulders. "You're gonna catch a cold."

Taeyong sniffles, "I'll be fine."

"Why didn't you call me at least?" Yuta frowns, his popcorn temporarily forgotten. "I could have gone and picked you up."

"I didn't wanna wait," Taeyong says, shaking out his bangs and then running his fingers through his hair. The strands slick back and stayed in place, doing things to Johnny's heart that no one else should know about. How is he so hot? "It's just a little rain. I'll go wash up. You guys got your dinner?"

Johnny shakes his head, "What'd you want?"

Taeyong shrugs but Yuta's the one to speak, "I'm going out with Mark for dinner. You guys wanna tag along?"

It probably isn't a wise thing to do for Johnny to look at Taeyong as if he'd go wherever Taeyong goes (not false) but he looks anyway and Taeyong seems to visibly shrink in on himself. Johnny recovers first, making a face at Yuta.

"Think I'll order something. I need to finish this assignment."

Yuta looks over at Taeyong, who shakes his head as well. "I need a shower. I'll have Johnny order for me."

"Okay," Yuta shrugs and gets off the couch, abandoning the tub of popcorn and grabbing the wallet he left on the table. "I might crash at Mark's, by the way. See ya."

Johnny meets Taeyong's gaze and they look at each other as Yuta leaves the apartment. With Yuta gone, they'd have the entire apartment to themselves tonight and Johnny's trying really, really hard not to look too excited. There are faint pink dusts on Taeyong's cheeks and he doesn't bother hiding his smile even as he excuses himself to his own room.

Johnny's grinning as he follows, though he falls short outside of Taeyong's closed door to shout his question. "What do you feel like eating?"

Taeyong's answer is almost too soft but Johnny heard him anyway. "Pizza. My usual."

  
  


* * *

  
  


Has Johnny ever mentioned that he's kind of allergic to pizza? Alright, alright. He's being dramatic. His lactose intolerance isn't even that bad and the only reason he avoids pizzas in general is because he's too focused on working on his body. Plus, he doesn't really get the hype.

Taeyong, on the other hand,  _ loves _ pizza. He doesn't always have it but on his good days, he'd order two boxes to last for two days, less if Yuta decides to steal a couple slices for supper. Taeyong acts as if it bothers him but Johnny knows he'd usually leave a few slices for Yuta to have.

Now, Johnny is seated on the couch, his assignment forgotten and abandoned to the side and he has the TV on for background noise. The pizzas are here and Taeyong is seated next to him, wrapped up in an oversized hoodie and his butterfly pajama pants. His hair is damp from the shower, fringe hanging over his forehead and he looks warm and cuddly and soft. 

The pinks in his cheeks make Johnny want to kiss them. He could, technically, but he doesn't know why he's overcome with a sudden shyness. This isn't them hooking up anymore; it isn't hurried touches and quick make out sessions. This is just the two of them at home, wearing their sleep clothes, basically snuggled up against each other watching some pointless show on TV and enjoying pizza, of all things

Taeyong is leaning his entire body weight against Johnny's side, head resting against the taller's shoulder and lazily taking bites off his pizza slice while Johnny tells him about how his classes have been. The topic steers to the girls that share his class and Taeyong scrunches his nose up when Johnny tells him one of them asked him out.

"Bummer," Taeyong murmurs, tossing the pizza crust back into the box and grabbing another slice. "Does that mean we're gonna have to stop making out in the dark?"

Johnny scoffs, his arm wrapped snugly around Taeyong's waist. "I didn't say I agreed to go out with her."

He hears Taeyong's smile more than he could see it, even though Taeyong quickly changes the topic. "Why aren't you eating? Did you order anything else?"

"It's pizza," Johnny grimaces, faking pulling away when Taeyong holds the slice up in front of his face. "I'm trying to stay hot. I like it when you stare at my abs before you suck me off."

Taeyong pinches his side, but his words are playful. "Gross. I'm eating. You have to eat, though. Wanna game? If you can't answer my question, you take a bite."

"Hey, that's not fair," Johnny frowns, poking into Taeyong's side. "What about you? What if you can't answer my question?"

Taeyong sits up then and Johnny quietly mourns his warmth. He places the slice back in the box and dusts his hands off the crumbs, an amused smile on his lips. "I'll take off my clothes if I can't answer your question." 

Johnny's eyes widened. A foolish man would decline and Johnny isn't  _ that  _ stupid. He laughs quietly, nodding his head. "Okay, game on. But you're answering Yuta if he catches you naked on my lap."

The smaller of the two rolls his eyes, leaning back against the other armrest so he could drape his legs over Johnny's thighs comfortably. "I'll go first. Why are you single?"

"Oh, you're getting straight to the point," Johnny laughs again, a hand subconsciously curling around Taeyong's ankle. He shrugs, carefully choosing his words. "I kind of have someone in mind. I'm not sure if they're into me, though."

Something brief flashes across Taeyong's features but it's too quick for Johnny to pinpoint. His lips tug up into a half smirk, using his foot to nudge at Johnny's thigh. "You kidding? Literally everyone is into you."

"Even you?"

Taeyong laughs, "Is that your question?"

Johnny takes a second to consider, afraid of the answer Taeyong would give but he nods his head eventually. "Yeah."

"I got you off pretty often in the last two months, didn't I?"

Johnny parts his lips but Taeyong seems to already move on from the topic because he picks up his pizza slice once again and continues to eat it, his expression thoughtful as he thinks up another question to ask Johnny. 

"Would you ever date a friend?" Taeyong asks, his wide brown eyes curious and his lips curled up, smiling. 

He could guess where Taeyong is going with this but guesses can only get him so far. Would it make him look stupid if he assumed Taeyong would consider going out with him too? Maybe. It's a big possibility. He doesn't want to risk it.

"Sure, why not?" He says, sinking into the couch until the hood of his hoodie is covering his cheeks. "If we have chemistry and if I really like them, I'd date them. Why are you single? Why are you single and hooking up with me?"

Taeyong clicks his tongue, "That's two questions."

"It's in a sentence," Johnny shrugs, eyeing the other quietly.

"I'll tell you when I'm ready," Taeyong says and he stands up to kick off his pajama pants. It does nothing to show off his shapely thighs because his hoodie is big enough that it reaches his midthigh. He still looks amazing but Johnny might be a little bit biased. 

Then Taeyong moves and straddles his hips and Johnny forgets how to breathe. 

His hands still know what to do so they curl around each of Taeyong's hips and he lets Taeyong's mouth bring him into a kiss. His lips part and Taeyong licks along his upper tier, his teeth, into his mouth and Johnny feels like he'd stopped breathing altogether. All there is in the moment is Taeyong.

When Taeyong pulls away from the kiss to press his forehead against Johnny's, he guides the taller's hands up under his hoodie so their skin would make contact. "Do you think anyone else would make you feel as good, Johnny?"

"Never," Johnny's answer comes immediately and he breathily leans into Taeyong's neck to suck red marks into his skin, hickeys that would last for days, but ones he knows Taeyong would look at in the mirror when he wakes up. Maybe he'd smile then. Maybe he'd smile and think of Johnny. The thought is enough to send him reeling.

Taeyong hums, head tilted back to allow Johnny access to his throat and his fingers are buried within Johnny's dyed blond strands as the taller continues to leave marks on him. "Not even the one you have your eyes on?"

Johnny wants to laugh because of how oblivious Taeyong is. He's sitting right here in his lap, talking about being better than the person Johnny wants, as if he could better than he already is. He wants to tell Taeyong so bad but Johnny isn't the bravest man out there and the moment calls for more actions than words, so he does just that.

He lets his fingers curl around Taeyong's slender throat and he pulls him down for another kiss. Hot and feverish and needy, as if they would lose tomorrow if they don't continue to kiss. It's a pull and push that has Johnny chasing after Taeyong's mouth and Taeyong doing the same. 

He thinks about taking Taeyong apart and putting him back together, thinks about touching him in places no one else is allowed to, thinks about kissing every inch of his beautiful body and tell him that he's made to perfection, even if he thinks his scar is a flaw, his body too small. 

In Johnny's view, Taeyong looks like the gods took their time with him. He sees the life in his eyes, the sharpness of his jaw, the lithe way his smaller body moves, the grace he'd shown in caring for the smallest things, like the potted plants lining the windowsill in his room, because it gets the most sunlight there. He sees Taeyong and not the 'ice prince' front everyone else sees; Johnny knows he puts it up because he's too afraid to let them in. 

"You're so…" Johnny sighs into the kiss, pulled back only so their foreheads could meet, their noses brushing against each other. He can't find the words. He might be overwhelmed by the emotions from just kissing Taeyong.

Taeyong giggles, bumping his nose to Johnny's. He never giggles but he's giggling now. "I'm so what?"

Johnny smiles and the hand he has around Taeyong's throat loosens just a tad so the pad of his thumb could brush over the male's lower lip. Taeyong kisses his thumb and his eyes are hazy and soft-looking, like he wants more than just sex with Johnny. The way Johnny wants more than just sex with him.

They'd never gone all the way but Johnny considers it. He doesn't doubt for a second that it would top any and every sexual experience he's ever had. Because it's Taeyong.

"Beautiful," He says finally, in an airy whisper against Taeyong's mouth and he kisses him again softly. 

He should start the conversation now, he knows that. It feels like the right time to do so, while Taeyong's looking pliant and soft and like he wouldn't hit Johnny for saying stupid things. Not that he ever did, but it's always good to be cautious. He's not Mark, who Taeyong playfully swats at for saying the most ridiculous things. He's not Haechan, who always made sure to get on Taeyong's nerves. 

He's Johnny and he'd like to think he's a little bit more special than Yuta is to Taeyong. 

His mouth parts to speak, to tell Taeyong that he wants more than just this, that he doesn't actually care that they'd broken the pact, that Taeyong doesn't have to worry because Yuta wouldn't actually mind. They've known each other for so long; if Yuta gets weirded out, he'd just have to deal with it.

"Taeyong-"

The sound of dangling keys turning the lock has Taeyong gracefully hopping off Johnny's lap and he's lightning quick to grab the throw blanket over his naked legs, hiding the pajama bottom underneath with him. Johnny's heart is racing against his chest but he tries to act casual as the door opens and Yuta walks in with a scowl.

A single glance at Taeyong tells Johnny his front is back up, the same blank gaze staring at the TV and no longer looking like he'd let Johnny pick him up bridal style. It's Taeyong that speaks up once he notices Yuta's expression.

"Dinner went bad?"

Yuta grumbles and goes to slip himself on the couch between them, nevermind the fact that it's supposed to seat two people only. Taeyong scoots further away but doing so and making it look like he's giving Yuta more space instead of making sure the blanket stays on him. 

"I've got a confession," Yuta says with a sigh, looking like he might actually throw up. "I have the biggest, stupidest crush on Mark."

Johnny and Taeyong share a look and Johnny says, "Did you just realize it and that's why you look like you're about to kill someone?"

"Maybe?" Yuta grunts and groans as he throws himself back, an arm draped over his face to cover his eyes. 

Taeyong clicks his tongue, "You know he has something going with Lucas, though."

"I know. That's why I said it's stupid." Yuta sighs, sitting up to run his fingers through his hair. "At least the two of you aren't doing stupid things. There can only be one dumbass in the group."

Johnny bites at his lip to keep himself from laughing, albeit humorlessly, because he's not sure what he's doing is a smart thing. He steals a glance at Taeyong but Taeyong is staring at his nails. The silence has Yuta looking at both of them with questioning eyes, frowning as if he expects them to agree.

"Well," Taeyong clears his throat, "We sure aren't crushing on our friends. That would've made things messy, don't you think? There's no going back once we cross a line. Like Doyoung and Jaehyun. They used to be so close."

_ Ouchie.  _ Was that supposed to hurt? It kind of hurts, a little. He's not sure if Taeyong's saying it to steer Yuta away from suspicious thoughts or he's telling Johnny that he has absolutely zero chance. He stares at his hands and contemplates saying his piece but Johnny thinks his brain to mouth filter has been tampered with.

"But it could also work out," He mutters just loud enough for the other two to hear him. "I mean, like, if two people like each other, they should try their best to work it out."

Taeyong stares at him and Yuta's scowl has turned into a teasing smile. "You like someone from the friend group, don't you? You do! Tell us?? Who is it?"

Johnny splutters, failing to find words and he should have probably shut his mouth but he says, "Maybe? I'm not telling you until it's like. Serious."

Yuta laughs, nudging at his shoulder and grinning as if he'd just told them he aced his exams. Taeyong, on the other hand, meets his gaze for a second. There's hurt in his eyes and he looks like he wants to disappear into his room but stopped because of the fact that he isn't wearing pants and Johnny realizes that Taeyong might be even more oblivious than he'd thought. He must think Johnny is speaking of someone else.

"It's not Taeyong or me, obviously," Yuta says as he dives into a guessing game, humming to himself. "Jaehyun? You guys have been super close lately. He called you his man, I heard."

Not false, seeing as Jaehyun shares most of Johnny's classes. It would make Johnny a complete ass if it was in fact Jaehyun, because Doyoung clearly isn't over him. But it isn't Jaehyun and Yuta doesn't know that. Yuta claps his hands together like he'd solved the puzzle, holding a finger up.

"It all makes sense now," He says, "You go to his parties without fail, you help him take notes for your classes, you buy an extra coffee in the morning for him. It's Jaehyun, isn't it? Holy shit. Holy shit, Doyoung's going to kill you."

Even Johnny's taken by surprise by how much he didn't notice. He does all that, sure, but as a  _ friend. _ Jaehyun falls asleep during morning lectures unless he has coffee so Johnny gets an extra to keep him awake and so that he doesn't have to lend his notes to the younger. He goes to his parties only if Taeyong is tagging along and Taeyong tags along almost every time. The points just matched up in coincidence.

Taeyong, however, doesn't know that. He's looking like he just realized everything makes sense, the difference between him and Yuta being that he doesn't look as happy to have it figured out. Johnny can't even assure him that's not the case without making Yuta question why Taeyong would need the assurance. Yuta isn't stupid. He and Haechan walk hand in hand  _ not _ minding their own business. 

When Yuta finally leaves for his room saying he's calling it a night, Johnny watches as Taeyong quickly pulls his pants back on. He glances at Johnny and he looks sad and Johnny wants to sit him down and  _ tell _ him but Taeyong's already walking away. Before he disappears into his room, he says;

"Thanks for dinner. I'll treat you next time so we're even."

He closes the door with a slam, leaving Johnny to clean up after him. He'd have to explain later, Johnny thinks, and he can't let anything come in the way of him clearing things up. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


It seems even doing so is out of Johnny's control. 

Every time he tries to get Taeyong alone so they could talk, there's always someone calling, or an assignment nearing its deadline, or sometimes even Taeyong just locking himself in the room pretending to be asleep but Johnny could hear the songs he's playing on speaker. They're usually slow, sad ones, so Johnny knows Taeyong isn't feeling his best.

He knows Taeyong. He knows what kind of songs Taeyong listens to depending on the time of day or his mood. He knows Taeyong only locks himself inside when he can't put on that brave face he leaves the house with every morning.

It sucks that Johnny had to be the one that caused it and it's unfair how he isn't given the chance to explain. He knows partly it's his fault; he should have come clean when he had the chance. Now Taeyong probably thinks he's pining after Jaehyun, who isn't even close to getting over Doyoung.

It's all messed up. He kind of wants to punch Yuta for even coming up with this pact but that's just him putting the blame on someone else when literally nothing is stopping him from waiting for Taeyong to leave his room and confess.

He's never had trouble confessing to someone before, when he was seeing other girls and boys for the fun of it. Taeyong is different. Taeyong is his best friend and he'd said things about Doyoung and Jaehyun that made Johnny nervous.

What happens if they don't work out?

That is, if Taeyong even returns his feelings. 

Johnny sighs, failing to focus in class as he twirls his pen, head full of Taeyong and how it's been two weeks since he last kissed him. He misses Taeyong, even though they see each other every day and Taeyong isn't ignoring him. 

"Yo, dude," Jaehyun whispers, nudging at Johnny's foot with his own. "If you don't stop sighing, I'm gonna be forced to ask you what the fuck is going on."

Johnny scowls, rolling his eyes and leaning back against his seat. He has to fight the urge to sigh again. They're far enough behind that their lecturer wouldn't notice them not paying attention. "Just stuff, okay? I'm fine."

"Okay," Jaehyun murmurs and just when Johnny thought he'd drop it, the younger asks, "Wanna tell me why Doyoung thinks you're trying to get with me? Which is not helping, bro, I'm trying to get back with him?"

Fucking Yuta. Johnny curses internally, leaning towards Jaehyun so he doesn't have to talk too loudly and risk getting caught. "It's a misunderstanding, okay? I'm not trying to get with you. Doyoung's been fed lies."

"So tell him that," Jaehyun whispers back, "He's not going to listen to me because I don't even know what the fuck's going on. If it isn't me then who? Yuta said you're into one of us."

"Yuta can suck it," Johnny huffs just as the lecturer announces the end of class and students start piling out of the auditorium. He gathers his things and shoves them in his bag, shouldering it as he rises to his feet. When Jaehyun follows, he continues, "Yuta found out I'm sweet on someone and made a guess it was you. He's wrong."

Jaehyun snickers, walking with Johnny out of the building. They don't have any class after this so Johnny plans to head home. Jaehyun seems to have other plans; "I might have another guess but I'm not gonna say anything. Your secret, right? Doyoung's class should have ended, he's always by the fountain to wait for Jungwoo. Make sure he understands."

With that, Jaehyun claps Johnny over his shoulder and walks off. Johnny feels a headache coming but he makes his way to the fountain, finding Doyoung exactly where Jaehyun said he would be. Doyoung's glare isn't something Johnny wishes he'd be at the receiving end of, but here they are.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Horror comes in different forms, right? This is how Johnny's experience went; 

Lunch with the guys is usually loud, so it didn't bother him all that much how chaotic the guys got, especially since Haechan and his friends joined them. Taeyong sat opposite him, picking at his food, while Jaehyun slipped between Johnny and Yuta to ask about the project that's due in a couple of days. He only briefly caught Taeyong looking.

He'd punch Jaehyun for this if he didn't know how desperate the kid is about getting Doyoung's attention. It was obvious in the way he leaned his cheek on Johnny's shoulder and wrapped an arm around his waist that he wanted to make Doyoung jealous. It wasn't even his fault that he didn't know Johnny was suffering his own crisis. 

The same crisis that led to the things that unfolded next; Hansol from one of Taeyong's classes came up to them, bold and brave, unlike Johnny. He greeted them with a nod of his head and a smile but his intention was to speak to Taeyong.

Johnny was there, so he heard every single word.

"There's a party at Seungcheol's tonight," Hansol said, bent down so he could level his face with Taeyong's. "I know you usually go with your friends but any chance you might wanna go with me?"

He didn't even sound nervous. Shouldn't you be nervous about asking Taeyong out? How is it that Hansol, a whole kid three years younger than Johnny, could pull this off so smoothly and Johnny's had years of trembling hands and racing heartbeats just  _ thinking  _ about Taeyong knowing?

Taeyong's mouth parted and then closed. He looked over at Johnny and glanced briefly at Jaehyun, whose arm was still around Johnny's waist, and he smiled up at Hansol.

"Sure."

_ Sure.  _ Sure, he said. This was Johnny's personal form of nightmare and he couldn't even be angry at Hansol for being brave enough to ask Taeyong out like that. 

Johnny considers  _ not  _ going but the idea of being at home while Taeyong is at the party having fun with Hansol is enough to get him off the bed and dress up in record time. Yuta was just about to leave but Hansol had picked Taeyong up nearly an hour ago so Johnny didn't see him.

"I honestly do not want to go," Yuta is saying as he starts up the car, dressed in a nude blazer that would not have made him look good if he wasn't Yuta. He's not smiling as he pulls out of the parking lot, looking like he'd rather be home despite the fact that he'd obviously taken the time to dress up. "I'm gonna have to watch Mark and Lucas suck each other's faces off. Gross."

Johnny clicks his tongue. He'd only put on his leather jacket but he'd styled his hair nicely. "That makes two of us. Think we should have stayed home?"

"Nah," Yuta snickers. "I'd rather do everything in my power to keep them off each other than mope at home.

"You're an asshole."

"Hey, they aren't a couple," Yuta rolls his eyes. "I still got a chance as long as they aren't."

Johnny can't even argue, but it gives him a little confidence boost that he could get Taeyong away from Hansol tonight. 

Seungcheol's house is even bigger than Jaehyun's. There are cars parked along the driveway, lining all the way over his front gate. It's a huge party, very telling in the way Johnny could already feel the bass beat of the music coming from inside the house. Finding Taeyong might be impossible.

Yuta must have made plans with the rest because as they make their way towards the house, Jaehyun, Doyoung, Taeil and Jungwoo fall in step with them. Haechan makes himself known not too long after, looking like he's already tipsy, with his friends Renjun and Jeno at his sides and Mark and Lucas behind them. Yuta not so subtly steals Mark away.

Inside, the music is almost deafening. People are dancing and drinking, and most of them Johnny doesn't recognize. His friends separate as soon as they were inside; Yuta drags Mark to the bar, Lucas disappears to god knows where, Doyoung and Jungwoo found seats to lounge on and Jaehyun tails them like a pup while dragging Taeil with him so it doesn't look pathetic. It kind of is, but Johnny doesn't have rights.

Finding Taeyong isn't as difficult as he'd thought it would be. What's difficult is taking in the sight of Taeyong, who seems pretty adamant on making sure Johnny doesn't survive the night, even though he's pretty sure Taeyong does it without even trying. This is so unfair.

He's wearing layers, like he usually would. His jacket is in a tan shade, topped over a plaid shirt and a white tee underneath. His jeans hug his legs wonderfully but what has Johnny twitching in his own jeans is the belt choker Taeyong is wearing. One end of it is left hanging down the middle of his chest, like a leash, and he'd smudged the red eye shadow below his eyes, lips glistening with gloss and silvery purple fringe over his left eye. 

Taeyong is dressed to impress and Johnny is hooked.

Hansol is nowhere in sight and Taeyong hadn't seen him so Johnny takes this chance to approach. Taeyong's leaning against the kitchen counter, a cup of something green in his hand and when he sees Johnny coming, there's a flash of panic that crosses his eyes before he quickly settles for an acknowledging nod of his head.

"Where's your date?" Johnny asks, taking the cup from Taeyong's hand to take a sip. He's surprised to find that it isn't alcohol.

Taeyong takes the cup back and downs it in a single gulp. Johnny tries not to watch the way his throat moves. "Where's yours?"

"I don't have a date," Johnny scoffs, moving to lean against the counter as well. "I came with Yuta."

"Mine can't believe I'm boring," Taeyong says casually, "I couldn't keep up with the conversation and he asked if I wanted to be left alone. What'd you think I said?"

Johnny frowns in disbelief. "No way. You're the least boring person. You have literally the most interesting topics."

This somehow makes Taeyong smile and Johnny takes pride in knowing he'd brought it on when Taeyong must have spent the entire night without one. Taeyong shrugs, "No one finds them interesting except you so I don't bother."

"You look great, by the way," Johnny blurts out and he's glad he did because he's tired of not saying things he wants to say. "Did you dress up to impress Hansol?"

Taeyong's gaze finds him and he looks dangerous in the way that Johnny thinks he could drown in those brown eyes if he doesn't grab something to hold on to. Taeyong leans closer until it's a little too close for a pair of best friends.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Taeyong asks and he's whispering, just loud enough to be heard over the music. When Johnny nods, he continues. "I wanted to see how you'd react when Hansol pulls me in for a kiss. He'd have his fingers curled around my leash. He'd kiss me and you'd watch."

Johnny's pretty sure he'd stopped breathing. He's torn between pulling Taeyong and kissing him right here or stealing him away to find an empty room so they could make out. "Your plans didn't work out?"

Taeyong shrugs, "Guess so."

"Good," Johnny says as he curls a bold hand around Taeyong's hip. "I wouldn't want anyone kissing what's mine."

A perfect brow quirks up with interest and Taeyong's lips are tugged up in a half smirk, "I'm yours now, is that it?"

"I think you've always been."

"What about Jaehyun?"

Johnny laughs, "I don't want him."

Something flashes in Taeyong's eyes. Unreadable, like the rest of Taeyong is, when he has that wall up around him. They stare at each other for an endless minute and then it's Taeyong that leans in and captures Johnny's mouth in a kiss. 

When his fingers curl around the leash of Taeyong's belt choker, it's natural instinct that prompts him into tugging at it. Taeyong moans and Johnny feels victorious. He's still vaguely aware that they're out in the open and he isn't sure if Taeyong is ready to be out so he pulls away only so he could tug Taeyong towards the stairs. 

They climb up with hurried steps, giggling and snickering when they open doors to occupied rooms until they find an empty one. Once they do, Johnny barely gets the time to close the door behind him when Taeyong pulls him in to kiss. 

Taeyong's mouth is hot as they kiss desperately, driven by need and a two-week longing that nearly drove Johnny mad. Breathing seems unnecessary, especially now that he's licking into Taeyong's sweet mouth. He backs the smaller male onto the mattress, fingers subconsciously tugging at the leash to keep him close, to keep in control. 

Even when Taeyong rolls them over so he's on top, Johnny keeps the leash curled around his fingers. He knows Taeyong likes the control, or the fight to stay in control, at least. But he also knows Taeyong likes it when he loses control, when he's pinned down and touched in places no one else could.

Only Johnny. Because Taeyong is Johnny's. 

"I missed you," Taeyong says breathlessly, straddling Johnny's hips and grinding his own pair down that gives Johnny just the right friction. It's embarrassing how hard he already is and Taeyong must know because he's smirking down at Johnny. "I know you missed me too."

_ Obviously,  _ Johnny wants to say but he settles for a nod and kisses Taeyong harder to show him how much. Taeyong's moans are heavenly, sounds Johnny would store in his memory to replay over and over. It catches in a gasp each time he grinds his crotch down against Johnny's, moans louder when Johnny tugs at his leash.

He clamps his teeth down onto Taeyong's upper lip, then his lower one just to hear him gasp once again. Johnny smiles into the kiss and feels Taeyong return it. They don't kiss again but Taeyong is breathing hot and heavy into his mouth while his hips grind at an increasingly growing pace, chasing after his high. Johnny moans, letting him, guiding him, tugging at his leash just for the whine that Taeyong lets out.

Taeyong's moans fill his ears, sounding like an angel sinning for a mere mortal like Johnny. He kisses down the side of Johnny's face, leaving open-mouthed ones along his jaw and down the column of his neck and Johnny tries not to complain about how he'd stopped grinding against him.

His free hand curls around the front of Taeyong's white tee and it tugs the neckline down enough to expose the small  _ '95'  _ tattooed onto his left clavicle, one that matches Johnny's on his middle finger and Yuta's on the back of his ear. Their friendship tattoo that comes with the pact.

It feels almost wrong to keep Yuta in the dark.

Johnny shakes the thought away to find that Taeyong had stopped kissing him. His lip gloss is smudged, kiss-swollen lips parted as they gazed at each other. He raises a hand, lets the tips of his fingers caress along Johnny's jaw and he looks like he's about to speak when the door handle squeaks.

Taeyong is lightning fast; in less than a second, he's rolled off of Johnny, landing onto the floor with a thud before crawling under the bed. He disappears in record time and rightfully so, because the door opens and it's  _ Yuta.  _

Yuta seems surprised to find Johnny there but he quickly recovers, looking like someone's just told him his grandmother died, which is impossible since she passed nearly ten years ago. 

"Sorry, couldn't find an empty room." Yuta says and then frowns, looking around the room. "Wait, what were you doing here? Were you- Is there someone else?"

"I had a headache!" Johnny blurts out, hoping Yuta would buy into it. "Thought I could lie down for a bit. What's up?"

Yuta sighs, dropping down onto the mattress to lay flat against it, staring up at the ceiling. "I told Mark."

Johnny's eyes widened. "You what?"

"I told him. It might have been stupid because I've only just realized I like him but I told him."

"What did he say?"

Yuta looks up at him and then he wordlessly scoots over so he could lay his head on Johnny's lap. Johnny's only glad his boner had died down. He runs his fingers through the younger's hair because this is comfort for Yuta and he knows Yuta needs it right now. 

"He has feelings for Lucas," Yuta finally speaks after a long moment of silence. "He told me that they're working it out and that if the time is right, they'll tell everyone. I just feel stupid."

"I'm sorry," Johnny murmurs, and he means it. He could only imagine how it feels and the idea of Taeyong even liking someone else could break him. "But that just means you'll find someone way better. You're awesome. Your standard's way higher than Mark."

Yuta scoffs, "I'm way out of his league. But it's whatever, I guess. I'm supposed to be mad at you too."

Johnny frowns as Yuta sits up, turning his body so he could face the oldest of them three. "Why are you mad at me?"

"Because," Yuta sighs, "I know you've been hiding things from me. You and Taeyong both. And I dunno, I just feel left out lately. Like, is there something you two are sharing that I'm unaware of?"

"What?" Johnny squeaks, clearing his throat quickly after. "What could we possibly be hiding from you?"

_ Classy.  _ He wonders what Taeyong is thinking while he's laying under the bed, listening to everything that Yuta is saying. He figures Taeyong would handle this situation way better than he is right now. He's soft with Yuta. 

Yuta rolls his eyes, "I don't know? That's why I'm mad? It's just- It doesn't feel good to be out of loop. I feel like I was gone a week for spring break and then I lost track of everything. Are you guys seeing anyone?"

"No," Johnny says, or chokes, shaking his head and failing to stop the guilt from washing over him. "No, we're not."

"Okay," Yuta says slowly and then he seems to soften up. "Good, then. At least I wouldn't feel like the complete loner whose crush rejected him."

Johnny fakes a laugh, "Yeah, no way, dude. We've got each other, remember? 95Line for life."

Yuta beams, nodding and then he thankfully hops off the bed and heads for the door, calling out something about getting drunk so Johnny would have to stay sober so he could drive them home. Johnny agrees; he doesn't feel like drinking.

After a moment, Johnny watches as Taeyong slips out from under the bed, panting from the movement and he wouldn't meet Johnny's gaze. He frowns, getting off the bed to sit by the edge, closer to Taeyong. "Alright?"

Taeyong glances at him, and he draws the curtains and pushes the window open for air. He's quiet for a long time and when he speaks, his voice is quiet. "Maybe we should stop… Whatever this is that we have."

Johnny has never been slapped before but this feels close to experiencing it. He's stunned into a momentary silence before he rises to his feet and closes the distance between them. "Why? Do you really want to?"

"No," Taeyong huffs out, turning to face him. Their height difference requires Taeyong to lift his gaze just a little. "I don't want this to end. But you heard Yuta. It's unfair to him that we not only broke the pact we agreed on but kept doing it behind his back. He's not stupid, Johnny."

Panicked, Johnny runs his fingers through his hair, trying to find words to stop Taeyong from making a final decision. "So we tell him. It won't be a secret anymore. We won't be going behind his back."

Taeyong's lips part, ready to protest, but his gaze has softened, almost like he wants what Johnny wants. "I- You want-? What do you mean?"

"I mean we don't have to be a secret anymore."

Pink dusts Taeyong's cheeks and he looks away, "It doesn't feel right to do that, Johnny. We already broke a promise and now we want to shove it in his face? That we're like- Together, or something. I just.. It doesn't feel right."

_ Wow,  _ Johnny thinks quietly. He never thought it would hurt like this. But they've always said that a breakup before you even get together would hurt tenfold. He clenches his jaw, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "We don't feel right to you?"

Taeyong looks at him, at his mouth, and he shakes his head. "I'm sorry. I just don't think I can do it."

Right. What else is Johnny supposed to say? If Taeyong doesn't want it, he can't force it, even if his heart feels heavy. It sucks so bad and it hurts to quite literally feel Taeyong slip right off his fingers. He can't find the words to say and maybe he should have but all he can do is watch as Taeyong leaves.

You can't lose someone who was never yours, right?


	3. Three.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hardest thing Johnny has ever had to do was sit on the couch in his own living room next to Taeyong and try not to take his hand, because Taeyong's hand is right there and Johnny can't touch him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> last chap is up! sorry in advance because i didnt proof read and there might be grammatical errors. thank you for reading!

The hardest thing Johnny has ever had to do was sit on the couch in his own living room next to Taeyong and try  _ not  _ to take his hand, because Taeyong's hand is right there and Johnny can't touch him. Taeyong's become untouchable when a month ago he would sit on Johnny's lap and kiss him.

It fucking sucks. Not to mention how painful it gets just thinking about never having Taeyong to himself, never kissing him again, never holding his hand, never looking into those warm eyes because Taeyong has pulled up that wall of ice around him and no one could get close. 

His mood swings have gotten worse too; he'd snap at anyone that got him on the wrong day, with Johnny and Yuta spared for some unknown reason. He's soft-spoken with Yuta but it took him nearly two weeks to be speaking to Johnny again.

Those two weeks were hellish because Johnny spent every night thinking Taeyong hated him and stressing about the fact that Taeyong might not speak to him ever again. He thought about how this was exactly why Yuta had come up with the pact because once they got something going on and it didn't work out, their friendship would be affected.

Most of all, though, he missed Taeyong. So much that when Taeyong started speaking to him again, Johnny couldn't help grinning. Taeyong had smiled and then they had gone back to the way things were before — pre spring break.

It doesn't get easier but Johnny thinks he would rather have Taeyong as his friend than not at all. He'd fight the urges to pull him to the side and kiss him, ignore the need to take his hand and squeeze it and he'd swallow the longing he feels for Taeyong's gaze, his warmth, his entire being. If they could stay friends, Johnny wouldn't risk losing it. 

It's just especially  _ harder _ at this very moment, watching Doyoung wrap an arm around Taeyong's shoulders and kiss his temple, even if it's a playful act between them. They'd gotten close enough for Doyoung to be able to freely touch Taeyong at random, like this, and usually Johnny wouldn't mind because they're friends and Doyoung would take another lifetime to get over Jaehyun, but today, all Johnny feels is that ugly green monster called jealousy.

He isn't jealous of Doyoung, per se, but the fact that if he does so much as pull Taeyong close he might be swarmed with the need to kiss him on the mouth and Taeyong wouldn't want that. Hence, friendship ruined.

They're all laughing about something, Johnny's stopped paying attention a few minutes ago, busying himself by staring into his americano. Anything is honestly better than having to watch Doyoung cling to Taeyong. 

"I thought it'd be nice to spend the long holiday up the mountains," Taeil is saying and everyone is quiet for once, listening. He continues, "Haechan and I's birthdays are coming up and we thought it'd be nice to celebrate together. Haechan's family cabins are vacant so we could book a few rooms before they open for other visitors."

"Oh! That sounds like a lot of fun," Jungwoo perks up, beaming like all odds are in his favor. "We've got two days and then the weekends, right? What do you guys think about going for three nights?"

Mark nods, agreeing. "Sounds good. Can Lucas tag along?"

Next to Johnny, Yuta tenses and Mark notices but Yuta clears his throat and stirs his drink with his straw, avoiding any eye contact with the rest of them. Taeyong eyes him for a second and then speaks up, "How many rooms?"

Haechan shrugs, "I'm booking about two cabins and there are three rooms in each so we can all spread out and room together. I'm bringing the guys with us too."

The guys he meant would be Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun, as far as Johnny knows. Disagreeing with the idea would be such a bummer and he doesn't want to disappoint Taeil. It's Taeil's birthday and Johnny never misses any chance he gets to celebrate it with the man. 

"I'm rooming with Jungwoo and Taeil," Doyoung claims, the arm he had around Taeyong now wrapped over Jungwoo's chest, hugging him close. "I'll take care of them."

Taeil laughs, waving it off before he stands up, reminding Johnny that his next class would start soon. "We're gonna have fun, I promise. Haechan and I have things planned."

Johnny has a guess someone is bound to get hurt, since Haechan is part of the party planner, but hey, what's a birthday without some kind of panic, right?

  
  


* * *

  
  


"I've decided not to go," Johnny tells the 95Line one morning before they'd have to drive up to the mountains for their cabin holiday slash birthday trip. He'd spent the entire night trying to pack his clothes but everything just ends up on the floor and by now he's given up.

Yuta frowns up at him, a spoon stuck in his mouth and a bowl of cereal in front of him. He's seated by the kitchen counter while Taeyong pours milk into his cereal bowl. Yuta takes his spoon out to speak, "You can't back out. I need manpower to back me up if I get in a fight."

Johnny stares at him, "You're not fighting anyone."

"It could happen," Yuta scoops another spoonful of his fruit loops, "I could get super drunk and piss off some people that'd beat me to death. I need you to save my life."

Taeyong shoves the box of fruit loops to Yuta for his refill and successfully distracts him before he turns to Johnny. He's in his blueberry pajamas he'd kill anyone who sees him in, excluding Yuta and Johnny because they've seen him in high school. "Why are you not going? Taeil's not gonna be happy."

Johnny shrugs, "If Taeil can come over and pack my stuff for me, I'll gladly go and spend time with him."

"Are you serious?" Taeyong asks and when Johnny only stares at him, he rolls his eyes and pulls Johnny with him towards Johnny's room. He shouldn't be surprised; Johnny's never been good with holidays and packing his things.

He could only imagine how much Taeyong is hating the mess of his clothes strewn across the floor. In his defense, he did spend too much time last night trying to decide which one of his clothes he should bring. Johnny's normally clean, cleaner than Yuta; he's pretty sure something actually died under Yuta's bed. Taeyong's been trying to get him to clean. 

Wordlessly, Taeyong sinks down to grab all the clothes that are all over the floor and then Johnny watches as he sits by Johnny's duffel bag and begins sorting his clothes out. He figures standing there isn't going to make the process go any faster so he sits next to Taeyong to help.

"You'll probably only need a pair of sleep clothes," Taeyong explains as he grabs a pair of Johnny's pajamas, rolling them neatly and putting them in the bag. "Maybe another two spares if Haechan's ideas involve surprise swimming or whatever. Another for day two and then whatever you wanna wear on day three when we get back."

If Johnny wasn't in love with Taeyong before, he sure is now. There's a soft edge to Taeyong in this state, his hair a tousled mess from being pressed into the pillows all night, his eyes still puffy from sleep. It probably isn't the best time to call him beautiful, but that's what he is to Johnny. 

He must be staring a second too long because Taeyong meets his gaze and his lips twitched, like he's fighting a smile. "Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?" Johnny asks back and he smiles because Taeyong is smiling.

One of Taeyong's hands lifts to brush Johnny's hair back and his fingertips not so subtly caress down the side of his face, thumb brushing over his cheekbone. "Did you sleep at all last night?"

Johnny shakes his head, just now remembering how tired he is. "I was panicking about not packing on time."

"You should take a nap," Taeyong says, sounding soft and affectionate and nothing like the boy who'd snapped at Haechan just the day before. "I'll help you pack. If you don't mind me going through your underwear drawer."

Johnny finds himself nodding before he remembers some of the things he'd stored in that particular drawer. Heat spreads at his cheeks as he fumbles with words to say, regretting his decision to hide his damn flashlight there, of all places. "Uh, I might have some things in there…"

Taeyong stares at him and then at the drawer. He inhales deeply. "I'll pretend I didn't see it."

"Yes, that would be great," Johnny laughs nervously, hating this, because he wants to be able to speak to Taeyong freely, be it about his classes or the fact that he uses toys sometimes to get off. Just for fun. "Thanks, Yong."

Taeyong smiles at him, getting up onto his feet and tugging at Johnny to move. "Go nap. I'll be done with packing once you're up. Yuta said he'll cook today."

Johnny grimaces as he climbs into bed, sighing in relief as soon as his head hits the pillow. He has a hard time opening his eyes again to warn Taeyong, "You should keep an eye on him. If he burns the kitchen down, we might need a new place."

Taeyong laughs and Johnny allows a smile to stretch at his lips, falling asleep to the sound of Taeyong shuffling around his room. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Yuta is the first to be ready when the morning comes, knocking obnoxiously on Johnny's door and yelling for him to wake up and get ready. Johnny's been up since dawn, thanks to the amount of hours he'd gotten from the nap the day before and he'd woken up to see his bag ready. Yuta's attempt at lunch was decent but Taeyong helped and then Johnny had gone back to sleep after he ate.

He's showered and ready, making sure he'd grabbed his chargers and laptop and that his windows are locked. When he leaves his room, he drops his bag on the couch to make coffee for himself. Yuta's already putting on his shoes, looking too excited for someone who doesn't want to spend the weekend with the crush who'd rejected him.

"Where's Taeyong?" Johnny asks as he steps into the living room with his cup of coffee, glancing over towards Taeyong's bedroom. "Shouldn't he be up by now?"

Yuta shrugs, checking his wrist watch for the time. "I guess we're early. Taeil said we should at least be out of the house by eight to beat the traffic."

Johnny takes a sip of his coffee before placing it down on the coffee table, walking the short distance to Taeyong's room and then knocking on his door gently. "Hey, Yong? You up? We're gonna head out soon."

There's some shuffling on the other side of the door, and then Taeyong opens it, looking like he had spent the entire night awake. "I might have to catch up with you guys later."

"What?" Johnny frowns, "What's wrong? I thought you're all packed up and ready?"

"One of my groupmates lost the file for our project before he could share it with us," Taeyong explains with a sigh, running fingers through his fluffy hair. "I've been up redoing it because it's due in a couple of hours."

"And it's not done?"

Taeyong shakes his head, "My friend probably passed out because they haven't answered any of my texts. I might have to finish up before I can go."

Johnny takes a moment to process this, not wanting to go without Taeyong and hating the fact that Taeyong would have to go alone. He glances at Yuta and tells Taeyong to continue the work he has to finish. 

"Hey," He says to Yuta. "You mind riding with Jaehyun? I might have to borrow your car."

Yuta frowns, "Aren't we taking my car together?"

"Taeyong has some things to finish," Johnny explains, picking up his coffee to drink again and not meeting Yuta's gaze. There's no need to let Yuta know that he'd run to the ends of the earth for Taeyong. 

There is silence for a second before Yuta speaks again, "Okay, I'll just hit up Jaehyun and see if I could hitch a ride."

Yuta calls Jaehyun to ask and Johnny doesn't wait to hear the conversation. Jaehyun is picking up Jungwoo and Doyoung so there should be room for Yuta. From the sounds of Yuta's laughing, Johnny knows Jaehyun is already on his way. 

He gets another cup of coffee ready for Taeyong and as soon as Yuta hands him the keys, Johnny knocks on Taeyong's door, hands him the coffee and sits himself down next to the boy and helps with whatever he can for Taeyong to finish.

Yeah, yeah, he's head over heels in love with a boy who thinks what they had feels wrong.  _ Sue me. _

  
  


* * *

  
  


It's nearly eleven in the morning when Taeyong finally wraps up and manages to email his lecturer just in time. He gets off the chair to stretch out, like a cat, with a groan and a half moan that Johnny tries hard not to think about. 

He thanks Johnny and then he disappears for a quick shower. They grab a quick bite in the kitchen because they'd forgotten breakfast and by noon, Johnny is pulling out of the parking lot. Like Taeil had warned them, the traffic is a bitch.

It's a two hour drive to the cabins but he knows they would only get there in three. Taeyong is already dozing off but he seems restless, turning to the right and then left, as if he's trying to keep himself awake. It probably isn't the right time to think he's adorable, but it's not like Johnny could help it.

"You should go ahead and nap, Yong," Johnny says as they make another pause in traffic. "I think Yuta has a blanket in the back. You've barely slept."

Taeyong makes a small little noise in his throat, "I don't want you to drive alone. I'll sleep tonight, promise."

"You're already passing out," Johnny laughs, eyes back on the road when the cars start moving again. 

Taeyong murmurs something incoherent and it only takes another minute for him to fall asleep. Johnny turns the volume of the radio down a notch before he puts on the playlist he knows Taeyong listens to whenever he takes a nap. It's alarming how much he pays attention but at this point Johnny knows he's beyond saving. 

The drive takes another two hours before Johnny finally finds a slot in the parking lot. It's almost three in the afternoon and as soon as he cuts off the engine, Taeyong stirs awake. He doesn't say anything so Johnny doesn't either, letting Taeyong take in his surroundings as he climbs out of the car.

Johnny's phone beeps as he goes around the car to grab their bags, checking to see that it's Haechan telling him all the rooms are taken except for the one in Cabin 209. It doesn't bother him; he wouldn't mind rooming with Taeyong since he'd basically done that all his life. 

"Good sleep?" He asks as he shoulders his duffel and hands Taeyong his. "We're gonna have to room together. Yuta's probably claimed the bed by the window."

Taeyong snickers, "He wouldn't miss the chance."

Johnny agrees with a laugh and they proceed to look for the cabin Haechan had booked for them. It isn't difficult to, since they bump into one of Haechan's friends Jeno on the way over. The younger boy tells them it's just a few minutes walk uphill and the room downstairs is vacant.

The cabin looks like all cabins are made to look like; made of wood structure and the number 209 printed large on the door. When they step in, it's empty, so Johnny assumes everyone has already gone for the day's activity. He'll make sure to ask Yuta where they are once he's settled in.

Curiosity got the best of him when instead of finding the room, Johnny heads to the kitchen. The cabin is fully furnished, complete with a coffee maker, an oven, a microwave and a juice blender. Everything seems to be in perfect condition too. Johnny doubts he'd be able to afford a night's stay if Haechan's parents decide to charge them.

He's thinking of probably making another cup of coffee when he hears Taeyong call for him. Coffee thoughts pushed aside, Johnny moves towards the direction of Taeyong's voice and finds himself stepping into a vacant room.

The first thing he sees is the single queen-sized bed in the middle of the room. It doesn't take him long to put two and two together. If this is the last vacant room in the cabin, Johnny would have to share the bed with Taeyong.

That's not the problem. The problem is that Johnny doesn't know if he could stop himself from doing things he might regret, like confess or watch Taeyong sleep.

How fucking sick would that be? He's so screwed.

"Uh," Johnny clears his throat. "I can take the couch. Or the floor. Whichever is fine by me."

Taeyong frowns at him, putting his bag down on the bed. "Are you crazy? You're sleeping on the bed."

"What about you?"

"You don't want to sleep next to me?" Taeyong's voice is teasing but Johnny could hear the fear in it. 

That's _ ridiculous,  _ Johnny thinks, but he says, "What? Of course I do! I mean, yeah I wouldn't mind. But I just- I thought you wouldn't want to-"

Taeyong sighs, unzipping his bag as he begins unpacking. "I don't- I don't mind you sleeping in bed with me. Don't do stupid things. The floor is cold and the couch is gonna hurt your neck because you have stupidly long legs."

From the number of times Taeyong has said the word stupid in regards to Johnny, he would have thought Taeyong hates him. He doesn't, obviously. Johnny can't be too sure but if Taeyong hates him then they wouldn't be friends, right? 

Instead of arguing, Johnny leaves Taeyong to unpack, walking over to the door beside the bedside table to see that it's a bathroom. He smiles, glad to have the bathroom to themselves, at least until he remembers that he's sharing it with Taeyong and knowing himself and his feelings for said male, Johnny's not gonna be able to stop from thinking thoughts he shouldn't have. 

Memories of their secret make-out sessions in bathrooms and empty bedrooms at parties flash over his eyes. It pierces his heart knowing those will only be just that; memories.

"You okay?" 

Johnny turns to find Taeyong looking at him, a folded t-shirt in his hand and concern in his eyes. He looks like an angel, Johnny thinks. Do angels come down to earth to make humans like him fall in love with them and not love them back? Sounds accurate. Taeyong might actually be one.

"Yeah," Johnny nods, abandoning his bag on his side of the bed and excusing himself into the bathroom. 

Two nights of sleeping in the same bed as the boy he's so madly in love with. Yeah, he'll survive.

  
  


* * *

  
  


The rest of the group had gone ahead for a swim at the lake behind the cabins. Taeil and Jaehyun work on setting up the barbeque pit while Doyoung and Yuta start the campfire. Most of the younger boys are in the water, obviously dodging responsibilities and having their fun.

As soon as Johnny and Taeyong arrive at the scene, Doyoung is quick to steal Taeyong away, asking for some kind of help with starting the fire or whatever. Johnny fights the urge to roll his eyes and opts to help Taeil and Jaehyun instead.

They get the barbeque going as the sun slowly sets. The boys are out of the water, presumably because they could smell the meat Taeil is grilling. Haechan is using his birthday privilege to do absolutely nothing but play while Taeil insists he cooks them a meal. They're two sides of a coin, truly; their differences are night and day but you don't see one without the other. Johnny would never understand it.

Johnny helps out with the food alongside Taeil because he refuses to sit around while Taeil sweats out grilling the meat for them to eat. From where he's standing, he's got a perfect view of Taeyong, who's seated with the boys around the campfire, facing Johnny, and laughing with Doyoung and Jungwoo at whatever Yuta is saying. 

The glow of the fire makes his eyes look like orange orbs. His nose scrunches up when he laughs a little too hard and it must be so funny because he's slapping at his own thigh and collapsing against Jungwoo. Johnny couldn't help the smile on his lips, which is a mistake because Taeil catches him.

"You're burning the food," Taeil says, using his tongs to flip over the steak Johnny was handling. "Who's got your attention like that, kiddo? You're drooling."

Johnny thanks the night for hiding the way his cheeks are burning. He clears his throat, feigning a frown. "I'm not drooling, what are you talking about?"

Taeil laughs, placing the cooked ones on a plate and grilling more of the marinated meat. "You're not very subtle, Johnny. You're sweet on him, aren't you? What are you doing staring at him instead of claiming him?"

What the fuck? How does Taeil even fucking know? He didn't mention names. Maybe he thought Johnny was crushing hard on Jaehyun like Yuta must have told everyone. That would make sense — 

"Can I get a refill?" Taeyong is saying as he places the once full plate down on the table. Johnny hadn't even seen him coming but he's smiling, looking for all the world like the bestest, cutest boy. Johnny's so screwed. 

"Of course!" Taeil says, filling up the plate with more meat and food they'd grilled. 

Johnny doesn't say anything but he could feel Taeyong's eyes on him. It's unnerving, though it's probably because he'd just been caught staring. It's the last batch of all the food they'd bought so they make sure it's fully cooked and Taeyong lingers behind until there's nothing left to fill the plate with.

They join the rest of the group around the fire and Johnny takes his place between Yuta and Taeyong. Mark is laughing hysterically at whatever joke Lucas is telling the group. Johnny only knows it's funny because Yuta is smiling too. 

It's good to see him smile. 

Jungwoo is seated next to Taeyong, the first one to dive into the new batch of food. Since Jaehyun and Doyoung aren't next to each other, Johnny could only assume they're in another one of their post breakup fights. He wishes they would just make up already, seeing that they very clearly aren't over each other.

After about half an hour of them finishing the food and laughing over the smallest things, Mark starts playing the guitar and things mellow down a notch. They're buzzing lazily with alcohol, the cans of beers that Johnny decided he won't have. Taeyong is swaying a little to the song Mark is playing but he isn't tipsy or drunk.

There's a sigh to Johnny's left and he turns to look at Yuta, who has his chin in a palm, gazing dreamily at Mark. Johnny almost feels sorry for him, if he doesn't know for certain that Yuta would find someone worthy of his time. He isn't saying Mark isn't, just that Mark isn't the right one. Clearly.

Maybe he isn't the right one for Taeyong. Maybe Taeyong isn't the right one for him. 

His throat goes tight at this thought. He'd wanted and loved Taeyong for too long to let go now, yet that seems to be the only option left. Taeyong doesn't want him, he should have known and remembered that when they were stealing kisses and engraving each other's touches into their skin. He feels sorry for himself and it's pathetic and sad. 

The prideful part of him says he should just let go. He should focus on someone else, like the different girls that come up to him every day hoping to get coffee or lunch, or for some of the bolder ones, a proper date. But the  _ Johnny  _ side of him would always think about how they could never be Taeyong.

And it's honestly so fucking sad. 

He's quiet as they make their way back to the cabins after Taeil pointed out that it's getting late and the boys are falling asleep. The walk back is slow and quiet save for the hushed whispers between Doyoung and Jaehyun. Johnny would try to eavesdrop if he wasn't so bummed about everything.

Yuta looks tired and sleepy, hands in his pockets as he kicks at stones as he walks. Johnny considers striking up a conversation but he knows Yuta like the back of his hand and if Yuta isn't saying anything then he probably doesn't want to say anything. Eventually Johnny watches as Jaehyun drags Yuta away angrily, presumably to their shared room.

_ Traitor,  _ Johnny thinks. Yuta could have saved a room for the three of them but instead he went to room with Jaehyun. 

The two cabins are side by side and before they disappear into their respective rooms, Taeil tells them to be up at ten in the morning for breakfast so they could leave for their hike on time. Johnny's not in the mood but it's whatever.

They bid each other goodnight and Johnny lingers behind to make sure everyone is safely tucked in bed. Being one of the oldest in their friend group gave him the sense of responsibility and it's a habit that he'd check up on them whenever they go on trips like this.

Jeno is rooming with Jaemin in the same cabin as Johnny, while Yuta and Jaehyun share their room, both of them upstairs. The other cabin houses Taeil, Jungwoo and Doyoung in the same room, Haechan and Renjun as well as Mark and Lucas, but Johnny lets Taeil do bed checks for that.

The boys fall asleep pretty quickly, thanks to the day's activities, and it's probably why they aren't complaining about Johnny checking up on them because it apparently means he's treating them like children. It never stops Johnny from doing so. They'd complain less when it's Taeyong.

Eventually, Johnny does what he's been avoiding. He goes into the room he's sharing with Taeyong, which might have been a mistake because now he's anxious about falling asleep and slipping up some things Taeyong shouldn't know. 

Inside, Taeyong is already in bed, scrolling through his phone and clad in his flower pajamas. He doesn't acknowledge Johnny stepping into the room so Johnny takes this chance to grab his sleep clothes and slip into the bathroom.

He takes a quick shower, trying not to think about how nervous he is because the last time he'd been in the same bed as Taeyong was about a month ago. Does he sleep with his back on Taeyong? Or does he face Taeyong and risk getting caught staring for too long? 

After drying himself and putting on his sleep clothes, Johnny spends about five minutes staring at his own reflection in the mirror, half hoping Taeyong would be asleep once he steps out. But knowing his luck, that's probably not the case.

Taeyong is putting his phone aside when Johnny finally leaves the bathroom, yawning and stretching like a cat and Johnny briefly thinks he should stop associating Taeyong to cats before it gets borderline weird. He makes sure to dry his hair and hang his towel before climbing into bed.

He feels the exhaustion as soon as his head hits the pillow, and he's face to face with Taeyong, whose eyelids are doubled with fatigue. He smiles and Taeyong smiles back. Despite telling himself not to stare, Johnny does just that.

"What are you thinking about?" Taeyong asks, voice quiet, as if he's scared the rest would hear him. 

Johnny shakes his head, "Nothing. Have you always looked so pretty though?"

Taeyong laughs, lazy and sleepy, as he pulls the duvet up to his chin. "Don't be silly. I'm not pretty."

"That's crazy to me."

"What is?"

Johnny shrugs, "That you don't think you're pretty. You're literally the prettiest person I've ever met."

Taeyong's smile is soft and warm and Johnny fights the urge to reach up, to card his fingers through his silvery purple hair. Taeyong is sleepy enough that he probably wouldn't remember this conversation in the morning and Johnny is okay with that. Maybe he'd remember it like a dream. 

"Thank you for thinking I'm pretty," Taeyong murmurs sleepily, eyes half closed. "You're pretty too. But you should sleep… We have to be up way too early tomorrow."

Johnny only nods and Taeyong probably couldn't see it anyway because his eyes are closed and he's already fallen asleep. Johnny smiles and he dares himself to reach up and brush back the hair that's gotten over Taeyong's eyes. 

He ends up turning his back on Taeyong, but only because he caught himself watching Taeyong sleep.

  
  


* * *

  
  


The hike, like most hikes, is not fun. At least not to Johnny because if it was fun then he'd probably have taken it up as a hobby. It's tiring and not the kind that he likes. He likes working out at the gym, he likes running a few laps to get his day started, he likes lifting weights. He doesn't like hiking.

Taeil seems to love it because he's packed with energy and he'd worn the right gear a professional hiker would. He leads the group of them up the mountain, feeding them little snacks in between and encouraging them with supportive words that Johnny personally thinks is a load of bullcrap.

He appreciates it nonetheless. It seems to work on Jungwoo because he's close behind Taeil, pulling Doyoung with him. Yuta grumbles his complaints under his breath but he stays far, far away from Mark and Lucas and latches himself to Johnny. Taeyong fares far worse; he'd just snapped at Haechan again for talking too loud. 

Now Taeyong's just walking on his own, his pace slow and there's a scowl on his face. Yuta's already gone to cling onto Jaehyun to keep his feet moving and the younger ones are complaining again up front, directly to Taeil. 

"Ten bucks I could make you smile," Johnny proposes as he falls back in step to match Taeyong's pace. 

Taeyong's scowl deepens, knuckles turning white from how hard he's gripping at his backpack. "Don't piss me off, John."

_ Oof, harsh.  _ But Johnny merely smiles because he's used to this. He knows this side of Taeyong and if you try enough, it really isn't hard to get a smile out of him. "Senior year high school. You drank a bottle of tabasco because your stupid crush said he'd date you if you did."

Instead of a smile, Taeyong glares at him. "I thought you said you'd make me smile, not remind me how stupid I was."

"Hear me out," Johnny laughs, dodging the hand Taeyong could have hit him with. "Listen, listen. Remember the first year of college? You got yourself a box of pizza and ended up not liking the new thing on the menu and you told me I should finish it if I loved you. Like, I know you were annoyed because I was teasing you about wasting food, but I finished it anyway."

Taeyong stops in his tracks and Johnny only notices when he's a few steps ahead. He turns to look at his best friend and he knows he'd said too much but he'd already said it and there's no taking it back. Taeyong looks like he'd just found out his succulent is dead. Johnny's almost sorry. 

His lips part to speak but then Taeil is calling for everyone to gather for a rest stop and they can't talk without everyone's attention on them. Johnny's the first to turn to join the rest of the group, settling down next to Yuta and Jaehyun. He dares a glance at Taeyong and to his surprise, Taeyong is still lingering behind, uncapping his water bottle, fighting back the twitch of his lips before he drinks. 

Johnny smiles. When their eyes meet, Taeyong is smiling. 

He guesses his attempt worked anyway, even if he did some damage in the process. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


They don't get to talk again through the rest of the hike and the journey back to the cabin. It's almost dinner by the time they reach the cabins and everyone is more than glad the hike was over. Taeil thanks them by announcing that dinner is on him, but they'd have to walk again to the restaurant. 

Taeyong showers first and when Johnny finishes his time in the bathroom, everyone is already waiting outside the cabins. Haechan complains about Johnny taking too long and how his stomach is already grumbling from hunger but Taeil waves him off and they set off to dinner. 

At dinner, Taeyong doesn't sit next to him and Johnny figures by now that Taeyong is avoiding him. It stings a little but he understands that Taeyong probably needs a little bit of time and space. If he'd pulled the same shit Johnny did earlier during the hike, Johnny would probably freak out.

Still, it sucks. He's so used to panicking about losing Taeyong as a friend by now that you'd think it'd be easier, but it isn't. He loses his appetite thanks to the anxiousness that's keeping his leg bouncing on his foot, and he eats only when Taeyong silently puts food on his plate.

If Taeyong notices, he doesn't say anything. Yuta, on the other hand, nudges at his foot and frowns in his way of asking what's up. Johnny merely shakes his head and forces himself to eat so he doesn't rouse more questions. 

During the walk back, Taeyong walks at the front with Jungwoo and Doyoung, instead of at the back like he usually would. Though Johnny guesses this is only because Doyoung had a lot to tell Taeyong, probably about Jaehyun. 

"Let's watch a movie!" Haechan suggests as they make their way back to the cabins. "All that hiking took away my energy, we  _ have  _ to do something fun before we go back tomorrow."

Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun agree immediately while Jungwoo looks to Taeil to see if he would be up for it. Taeil is Taeil so he quickly decides a movie would be good. They pack into Taeil's cabin and the younger boys get ready snacks and drinks while Haechan works the DVD player. It's a surprise the cabin still has one but it's a nice touch.

Haechan plays a random DVD from the shelf, a horror film Johnny has never seen or heard of before, which is good since he wouldn't want to watch something he already has. With thirteen of them in the cabin, some of the boys had to squeeze together on the couch, some made themselves comfortable with blankets and pillows on the floor.

Johnny had chosen a seat on the couch and he knows Taeyong would probably have sat somewhere else if Yuta hadn't saved a seat for him next to Johnny. Taeyong's smaller stature allows him to comfortably be squished between Johnny and Yuta's bigger frames and Johnny's glad he doesn't seem too stiff or uncomfortable about being this close.

_ This sucks ass,  _ Johnny thinks. The movie is playing but all he can think about is having to go through another period of time not getting to talk to Taeyong and that's honestly the worst thing that could ever happen to him. 

The few jumpscares are enough to get some of them to flinch and shout, save for Taeil, who's been kind of immune to horror films for as long as Johnny had known him. Yuta is asleep next to Taeyong and Jaehyun and Doyoung are cuddled up, though Johnny's pretty sure it's by accident.

The younger boys have their faces half covered by their blankets and Johnny hugs a pillow to his chest but Taeyong's face is buried into Johnny's shoulder. He doesn't dare move a muscle lest Taeyong decides to pull away. 

By the end of the movie, Taeyong's arms are wrapped around Johnny's, cheek pressed to his shoulder and everyone else groans and complains about the bad ending. Yuta only wakes up to drag himself upstairs, probably to go back to sleep.

Haechan plays another movie but Johnny's not in the mood to watch any more so he excuses himself and bids them goodnight, promising to be up early tomorrow to get their breakfast. He leaves with their murmured thanks tailing him.

The plan is to sleep off all the anxiety he's feeling, or try to at least, since it would probably keep him awake anyway. He tries not to think too much about how much damage he'd caused, how Taeyong might never ever talk to him again like he'd ignored Minho for the rest of senior year and then ultimately for the rest of his life because even the mention of him gets Taeyong in a sour mood. 

The crush was  _ bad  _ bad. Only Johnny and Yuta would know — Johnny might have been so sad about it that he'd dated Reina the cheerleading captain out of spite. Of course, it only bothered Taeyong because he hated her laugh and her in general. For some reason, they lasted until graduation.

The sound of the door opening has Johnny turning around too quickly, his brain wired to think that some murderous spirit is here to kill him, thanks to the movie they were watching. 

It's only Taeyong, closing the door behind him quietly and looking as though he might either cry or throw up. Johnny guesses this isn't going to go so well. Taeyong must be here to talk about what happened, but at least he's talking. 

They're silent for the longest time, Johnny staring at Taeyong and Taeyong staring at Johnny, neither of them knowing what to say. Johnny sighs and sits himself down on the edge of the bed. He waits, because he doesn't trust himself.

Finally, Taeyong speaks up, "Did you mean it?"

"Mean what?"

Taeyong clenches his jaw, leaning back against the door and staring up at the ceiling with a sigh. "What you said during the hike. Did you mean it?"

See, this is the funny part about literally everyone. Johnny knew Taeyong came to talk about what happened during the hike, yet hearing him asking it aloud still surprises him. He considers lying, maybe tell Taeyong that of course he loves him, like Yuta loves him, like a brother would love him.

Johnny's just kind of tired of lying and hiding.

"Yes."

Silence. He looks up to see Taeyong staring hard at him. Taeyong looks soft and small, his purplish silver hair let down over his forehead and he's fumbling with his thumb like he doesn't know what to do with his hands.

"How long since-"

Oh, boy. Here we go. Johnny remembers it like it happened yesterday. "Two months after you turned sixteen. We went on a trip to Yuta's family villa in Japan. It was just the three of us and his grandpa and we were playing in the pool. You were just… laughing. You were laughing and you made that ugly snorting sound that made you laugh even more and I thought, why did I like that?"

Taeyong blinks, shaking his head. "But you dated Reina."

"Because you were, like, half in love with Minho," Johnny rolls his eyes, throwing his arms up in the air in defeat as he gets up on his feet. "I dated her out of spite. It didn't bother you one bit."

A scoff leaves Taeyong's lips and he looks like the way Johnny always felt whenever Taeyong shows just how oblivious he is about Johnny's feelings. "I was pissed as hell."

"Okay, because you've always hated her. That's why I even dated her in the first place."

"No, you idiot," Taeyong rolls his eyes, "I was fucking jealous of her. I started crushing on you after you took care of me when I got food poisoning from drinking tabasco. And then you dated her out of nowhere. It didn't make sense."

Johnny tries to recall this. Sure, he remembers taking care of Taeyong but he's been taking care of Taeyong since they were in middle school. How could he have known? He only realizes Taeyong had confessed when his words are replayed in his head and it's enough to bring color to his cheeks.

"But you…"

"No buts," Taeyong shakes his head, moving off the door to step closer to Johnny. "I've liked you since senior year. Why'd you think I stayed single this whole time?"

He looks at Taeyong now and he wants to kiss him again but he's momentarily stuck in the moment. They stare at each other and Taeyong is so close, so real, despite his words sounding like some kind of dream to Johnny. 

"Do you, like, still like me?" Johnny asks. In his defense, it doesn't sound half as stupid in his head.

Taeyong stares at him and he sighs like he's tired of Johnny asking stupid questions. When Johnny just gazes back at him, Taeyong murmurs something incoherent under his breath.

And then he's stepping even closer, hands on either side of Johnny's face and his mouth feels hot against Johnny's. He kisses fiercely and Johnny only returns the fervor. His own hand goes up, fingers curling perfectly around Taeyong's jaw and he feels the smaller male's arms slip down to his sides.

Taeyong chases his mouth each time they pull away for air, growing impatient and needy with every kiss, every swipe of Johnny's tongue and he whines when Johnny's fingers slide down to curl around his throat. Johnny kisses him feverishly, licking into his mouth before he ultimately chooses to tease by kissing along Taeyong's jaw. He presses open-mouthed ones down the column of his neck and baths in the sounds of Taeyong's moans. 

"Your neck fetish is pissing me off," Taeyong mumbles in complaint but he still gasps when Johnny nips at a sensitive spot, his body relaxing.

Johnny smiles against his skin, "You like it."

Taeyong's breath hitches, either from the way Johnny runs the tip of his tongue over the spot he'd nipped or from his attempt to speak, Johnny doesn't wait to find out as he maneuvers them onto the bed. Taeyong lands on his back with another gasp but he's smiling, his legs immediately encasing Johnny's hips as soon as Johnny returns to kissing down his neck.

He misses this, Johnny realized. He misses leaving his marks on Taeyong's skin, misses tasting him on his tongue, misses being this close, chest to chest, lips on lips. When he's satisfied with the litter of red hickeys over Taeyong's neck and clavicle, Johnny pulls back, pausing just to study Taeyong.

Taeyong looks dazed, mouth swollen from their kisses and cheeks dusted with a sprinkle of pink. He smiles up at Johnny and he looks so soft, so pretty, Johnny couldn't help the kiss he presses onto Taeyong's lips. 

"Hi," Taeyong says endearingly, one of his hands raised so he could brush fingers over Johnny's cheek. 

Johnny kisses his warm cheek, "Hey, baby."

That should be an acceptable term now, right? He's always wanted to call him baby. Taeyong seems to like it, if the way the color in his cheeks deepen is anything to go by. 

Taeyong is quiet for a moment, but he steals kisses in between, soft lips meeting Johnny's jaw, Johnny's mouth. When he pulls back, his eyes are searching, their faces so close Johnny thinks this might be part of his dream.

"What's wrong?" Johnny asks, fingertips brushing over Taeyong's cheek, brushing back his hair.

Taeyong shakes his head, smiling a little shyly and Johnny watches as he bites down on his lower lip. "I was just… Are you going to fuck me?"

The only thing stopping Johnny from choking on his own spit is the fact that his dick twitched in his jeans. He kisses the tip of Taeyong's nose, laughing softly. "You want that?"

"Yes," Taeyong answers almost immediately. "I missed your dick. And you, in general. I want you to have me."

What can Johnny say, really? If he opens his mouth there's a chance he might ruin the moment so Johnny leans down and kisses Taeyong again, hungrier, needier, licking into the male's mouth as he lifts himself up by a slight just so he could pull Taeyong's hoodie up and over his head, tossing it aside.

He starts kissing over Taeyong's jaw, onto the red marks he'd left along his neck, down to his chest and his pink nipples. Taeyong shudders at the contact and Johnny smiles against his navel, kissing the soft skin as his fingers work on undoing his jeans. Taeyong moans softly, lifting his hips up enough for Johnny to push his jeans down.

Taeyong is already hard, like Johnny is, but he ignores the twitching cock in favor of kissing his skin, guiding his thighs up and apart. Taeyong's cheeks are a deep shade of pink when he looks up to see his face and he watches his expression as he dips his head and presses an openmouthed kiss onto his hole.

There's nothing hotter than the sight of Taeyong's eyes rolling back and his spine arching off the bed so Johnny continues to pay attention to his rim, tonguing at the ring of muscle and working him open with his tongue. 

"Johnny…" Taeyong sighs, a hand reaching down to curl around a lock of Johnny's hair. "Please.."

On his knees, Johnny has the perfect view of Taeyong with his legs spread, feet planted into the mattress and moaning while Johnny eats him out. Taeyong is beautiful in general, but like this, he looks like an angel sinning. Johnny laps at his rim, using his spit to slick up the entrance and once Taeyong is dripping with his saliva, Johnny slowly pushes a finger in.

Taeyong gasps, body twitching and his channel swallows Johnny's digit easily. He watches as Taeyong moans while he pumps the finger in and out of him, working him open and loosening him up before he adds a second finger. There's resistance but soon each thrust becomes easier. Johnny gets off his knees and plants one onto the mattress, free hand curling around Taeyong's throat and he kisses him just as he slips a third finger and begins fucking into him roughly.

Lube would be ideal but he doubts Taeyong packed a bottle or a packet of it on a trip with a bunch of his friends so his spit would have to do. He'd made sure Taeyong was slick enough so it doesn't hurt him. Taeyong gasps and sobs as Johnny continues to fuck him with his fingers, and the moment he curls them into the spongey spot of his prostate, Taeyong is  _ begging.  _

"Please, please, please," Taeyong sobs, hips rolling down pathetically. "I need your cock, please. Fuck me."

_ Fuck.  _ Johnny curses low under his breath, his own jeans tight and it's with great reluctance that he pulls his fingers out of Taeyong so he could push his own jeans down. Taeyong whines, but he doesn't need to be told what to do when Johnny's cock slaps up against his toned abdomen, sliding off the bed and onto his knees, fingers curling around the shaft.

Johnny moans at the contact, pulling his shirt off and casting it aside without looking away from the sight in front of him for too long. Taeyong's gaze meets his, tongue out and he slaps Johnny's fat tip over the pad of his wet muscle before he makes a show of dripping his spit onto the slit.

It's so fucking hot. Johnny could already feel the twisting pleasure in his belly and Taeyong isn't shy in making sure he's  _ absolutely  _ coated in his spit. When Taeyong takes him into his small mouth, Johnny's knees nearly buckle under his weight. He gasps and releases a low grunt as Taeyong almost immediately begins bobbing his head, hot mouth moving over his cock in quick, wet slides. 

"Holy shit, baby," Johnny groans, fingers grasping at Taeyong's hair but he lets the smaller move at his own pace. It's good. It's amazing. It's even better when Taeyong  _ gags,  _ eyes rolling back as his body heaves, and when he pulls away there's a string of precum and spit that connects Johnny's cock to his mouth. 

His big, wet eyes find Johnny's, fingers stroking at his length and there's a pout on his mouth, like a child begging for ice cream. "Will you fuck me now? Please?"

Johnny nods, breathless. "Get on the bed, baby. I want your face down and ass up for me."

Taeyong's eyes darken and he moves onto the bed, getting onto his knees and pressing his cheek down against the mattress with his ass up and ready for Johnny to have. His pretty pink hole is on perfect display like this, glistening with spit and begging to be fucked. 

He strokes at his own cock, moaning as he positions himself behind Taeyong, teasing his hole by sliding his slicked shaft between his asscheeks. Taeyong whines but he stops when Johnny presses a large palm onto the base of his spine, pushing him down with his thighs spread apart and he gasps as soon as Johnny pushes the fat tip into his hole.

Johnny has to take a moment once he's fully sheathed inside Taeyong, overwhelmed by how hot and tight Taeyong's body is wrapped around him and he probably would have, embarrassingly, cum too soon had Taeyong not start pushing his hips back, desperate and impatient. 

"You're so big…" Taeyong moans, sounding wrecked even though Johnny has barely started. "You're gonna tear my pussy apart, Johnny. I want you to go hard on me. Want you to use me the way you use your toys."

And like, Johnny's a man. He's a man who's dreamt of his moment for years and years and while he'd beaten himself up for such filthy things, he hadn't stopped fantasizing Taeyong. Each time he pumps into his fleshlight it's Taeyong he pictures. And now he has the real thing. It's a miracle he hasn't orgasmed just yet. 

He pulls back, sliding out of Taeyong agonizingly slowly, until it catches at his tip before he snaps his hips forward, shoving his cock hard and deep inside the smaller. It has Taeyong's entire frame jostling forward and Johnny takes pride in the way Taeyong cries out, telling him he'd found his prostate easily. He repeats the motion, pulling back slowly and fucking into him hard, over and over until Taeyong is sobbing, crying into the sheets.

It's only when Johnny grips onto a lock of Taeyong's hair and pulls his upper body up, using it as leverage that he picks up his pace. He starts with quick thrusts of his hips, cock fucking into Taeyong's body and grunting each time Taeyong clenches around him. He fucks him hard enough that Taeyong is left flat upon the mattress, whines and moans leaving through parted lips. 

"Johnny- Fuck! Harder, please. Fuck me harder." Taeyong begs, so Johnny lets go of his hair and grips at his hips to quicken his pace, driving deeper into the male. 

_ Shit.  _ Taeyong is so hot. Johnny knows he'd never be able to fuck someone else now and not think about how tight Taeyong's ass feels around his cock. His cheeks jiggle each time Johnny's hips snap forward and he cusses as he lands a hard slap over Taeyong's ass, enough to leave a glaring print on his fair skin.

The spank seems to have stuttered Taeyong's attempts to fuck back onto Johnny's cock and Johnny watches as his entire body shakes. "Oh my god- Holy shit, Johnny. Fuck, stop. Give me a second. I was so fucking close."

Johnny stops moving, laughing softly and he takes this time to lean over Taeyong's body, at the same time pushing even deeper inside him. Taeyong moans, gasping when Johnny presses into his prostate. Johnny doesn't move just yet, kissing Taeyong's hair before he picks up a slow grind of his hips, each roll causing his cock to press harder into Taeyong's sweet spot, leaving the smaller keening.

"You feel so good, baby," Johnny whispers into his ear. "Did you like it when I hit you? You really do like pain, huh?"

Taeyong whines, nodding. "God, yes. I was so close… Will you hit me again? Please?"

"You want that?" Johnny teases, pausing the rolls of his hips. Taeyong nods again, whimpering, hips pushing back. Johnny laughs into his shoulder and he straightens up, maneuvering Taeyong's hips up just enough for him to be able to fuck into him easily. 

He resumes the fast pace of his hips snapping forward, cock sliding in and out of Taeyong's wet channel with loud, squelching noises that fill up the room. He lands a palm onto the other cheek, watching as a mirror of his handprint forms on the pale skin and Taeyong jerks forward and sobs.

So Johnny does it again. And again. And again. 

"I'm so close," Taeyong cries out, voice muffled against the sheets. "Oh my god, please. Please! Let me cum. Please let me cum. Fuck."

Johnny groans as he pulls out of Taeyong, resulting in the smaller male literally crying out for him to put it back in. He rolls Taeyong over onto his back and reenters him just as immediately, picking up the brutal pace of fucking into his prostate. Taeyong is clenching so hard around him, eyes rolling back and it's only when Johnny squeezes around his throat that Taeyong cums, hard. 

His release sprays over his abdomen and Taeyong is choking until Johnny lets up. His face is pure bliss even as Johnny chases after his own orgasm, using Taeyong's hole to get off. He gasps as he empties inside of the other, cock twitching and muscles straining. 

Taeyong winces when Johnny pulls out and Johnny makes sure he collapses next to Taeyong instead of on top of him. They pant, trying to catch their breathing and Johnny's still seeing stars from his orgasm when he hears Taeyong laugh.

"What's so funny?" Johnny asks though he couldn't help the smile on his lips. 

Taeyong looks wrecked next to him, hair matted to his forehead and sweat making his skin glisten and glow. He's beautiful and Johnny can't help but shift onto his elbow so he could kiss Taeyong on his cheek and his mouth.

"Nothing," Taeyong says, smiling into the kiss. "I just can't believe it took us so long to get here."

"To fuck? We could have when we started making out." Johnny laughs teasingly, getting down onto his knees on the floor and grabbing his shirt to wipe at the mess on Taeyong's chest. He'd have to throw it later.

Taeyong rolls his eyes, "We could have. And I wanted to but like, I didn't want to give myself to you completely if you don't feel the same for me."

Johnny softens and he smiles at the boy as he gives his thighs a little massage. "I'm glad we waited."

"I'm glad you like me back," Taeyong giggles and he sits up to cup Johnny's cheeks in his hands to guide him up for a kiss. 

They spend the time kissing, Johnny gently guiding Taeyong to lay back so he could clean him up. His touches are gentle and his kisses soft. When he deems Taeyong is well enough and a little steadier, he carries the smaller into their shared bathroom and they take a quick shower together.

Johnny helps Taeyong dry off, making sure to be gentle with his hair, his body and the places Johnny had gripped a little too hard. His neck is littered with hickeys, a work of art, and Taeyong doesn't seem to mind them one bit. 

It's midnight when they finally settle in for bed. Johnny spoons Taeyong, wrapped up in one another under the duvet. The silence and Taeyong's slow breathing led Johnny to believe he's fast asleep, at least until he speaks up.

"Are we together?" Taeyong asks, soft and shy, against the material of the duvet that's pulled up to his chin.

It's endearing and Johnny doesn't hide his smile as he kisses Taeyong's damp hair. "I want us to be. Do you?"

"Yes," Taeyong says with a sigh of the relief, but then he adds, "But what about Yuta? What do we even say to him?"

Johnny wonders the same but there's no way he'd ever let Taeyong go now and hiding their relationship would only complicate things. "We should tell him."

"What if he hates us?"

"No way," Johnny shakes his head, "He loves us. He'll understand. Maybe he'll be a bit mad at first but it'll be okay."

Taeyong hums, low under his breath. It's another five minutes of silence and Johnny nearly falls asleep when Taeyong speaks again. "You're telling him."

Well,  _ of course he is. _

  
  


* * *

  
  


Telling Yuta is easier said than done. 

Johnny expected this, of course, and he'd woken up in the morning to the sound of Taeyong packing their things back into their bags, thinking about ways he could bring up the conversation with Yuta. He comes up with none.

They discussed a little on how things should go and decided that they should keep it hidden from everyone for the time being, at least until they manage to come out to Yuta. Taeyong suggested that they do it once they're back home and Johnny agreed.

Taeil sent them a message saying they'll be checking out by noon. They skipped breakfast to make out a little bit, which led to a little more than a make out session that had to stop abruptly because Taeyong realized it's almost noon. 

Still, at the door just before Johnny opens it, Taeyong pulls him in to steal a kiss. They share a smile and when they leave the room, Taeyong's expression returns to its stoic normalcy and Johnny pretends he hadn't just given Taeyong his heart.

The group is chaotic when Johnny and Taeyong join them in Taeil's cabin; half of them arguing about whether or not they've seen Jaemin's phone charger and the other half lazily playing with their phones. All of them turn to Johnny and Taeyong the moment they step inside.

For a second there, Johnny wonders if they were too loud last night and everyone already knows. Thankfully, Yuta saves them. 

"Got lip gloss on your chin, Taeyong," Yuta says casually before returning to his phone and while Taeyong quickly wipes at his chin, the rest return to their argument.

Close call. Maybe a little too close because Jaehyun is staring at them with a brow raised, obviously curious. Luckily, Taeil chooses this time to tell them they're ready to move. Of course, Taeil might already know, if whatever he said during their barbeque alluded to anything.

They pile into their respective cars. Jaehyun had driven Taeil, Yuta, Jungwoo and Doyoung on their way over to the cabins, but Yuta takes back the car he'd lent to Johnny, while Lucas drives Mark, Jaemin, Renjun, Jeno and Haechan in his truck.

The car ride is quiet save for the music playing from the radio. Yuta is driving and Johnny is in the back, nervous as hell and wishing Yuta would say something. Taeyong could pass off with nothing to say because he rarely says anything and Johnny doesn't know what conversation to start. 

In the end, when Yuta turns the corner towards their apartment building, he says, "You two are gonna sit me down to talk about something, aren't you?"

Johnny swallows and he sees the way Taeyong's body tenses up. Yuta doesn't try to meet his gaze through the rearview mirror. He doesn't look angry but he doesn't look happy either. It gets Johnny's heart kicking to an overdrive.

He guesses it was pretty obvious, especially to Yuta, since they've known each other for so long. Still, it doesn't make Johnny less nervous. He's pretty sure it shows, and he's jealous of the fact that Taeyong could maintain his blank stare. Taeyong is so good. Johnny kind of wants to kiss him.

Upstairs, Yuta wastes no time. He drops his car keys into the bowl he usually kept his keys in and he sits himself down on the couch, staring at the two of them expectantly. Taeyong sighs and he takes his seat next to Yuta so Johnny does the same. It feels a little bit like telling your child you're getting a divorce, except it's the opposite. And Yuta might lash out.

"I think there's a high chance you'll probably be mad and hate us forever," Johnny starts, looking at Taeyong to see that his boyfriend (boyfriend!!) is rolling his eyes at his choice of words. Johnny continues anyway, "And I know we made a pact but… Taeyong and I are together."

Yuta's mouth parts to speak, seemingly knowing just what to respond with until he properly registers. He frowns. "What?"

"I mean, there are still things we have to work on and-"

Taeyong's lips press together, worried as Yuta looks between the two of them. He meets Johnny's gaze momentarily and Johnny clears his throat, bracing himself from whatever Yuta's next reaction would be. This is proving to be harder than him coming out to his parents at fifteen years old.

"Wait,  _ what?" _ Yuta repeats in disbelief. "I thought you guys were just hooking up??"

Johnny blinks and Taeyong's cheeks are flushed when he glances at him. Had Yuta known all along? "You knew?"

Yuta rolls his eyes, "You guys are the least subtle people I know. And we met in middle school; I know how you look like when you shat in your pants. Disappearing at parties? Taeyong being so goddamn jumpy whenever I walk into the room? You were fucking behind my back."

"Wait, wait, wait," Johnny laughs nervously, clearing his throat. "It doesn't sound as bad as you're putting it, Yu. We weren't fucking. I'll spare you the details but we just wanted you to know that we're working things out now and if it works then, you know, we're together."

Taeyong dares a touch to Yuta's knee, squeezing gently. "We're sorry we broke the pact, Yuta. We'd understand if you're angry with us. But I hope you'd let us make up for it."

"I'm not angry," Yuta says, sighing as he leans back. "I just- You could have just told me, you know? I've felt like an outsider for the last couple of months and it sucks because I thought we tell each other everything."

"That's my fault," Taeyong admits, hooking his arm around Yuta's and resting his head on his shoulder. "Johnny wanted to tell you sooner, but I was scared that coming out would make you feel alone and also because.. I didn't know Johnny felt the same way for me."

Yuta shakes his head, "I would have just been happy for you. I know I've been complaining a lot about being alone but I have you guys. The pact was stupid and we were drunk and I wouldn't have been mad if you just told me."

Johnny's a little relieved because Yuta doesn't look as surprised or even a little bit angry. Maybe a little sad but Johnny knows just how to make him smile again. He leans back, shoulder to shoulder with Yuta and he asks;

"So, do we get your blessings?"

"Like I'd want to see you guys mope around like the last couple of weeks? Fuck no. But you owe me a week's worth of lunch and dinner. Make it two weeks."

Taeyong rolls his eyes and he straightens up to smile at Yuta. "We're okay? You don't hate us, do you?"

"Nah," Yuta laughs, shaking his head again. "But no sex on the couch. I don't wanna be sitting on cum stains."

"Alright!" Johnny is quick to get back onto his feet, flashing Yuta an innocent smile. "I think this talk is over. Thanks, buddy, for like, not getting mad."

Yuta makes a show of sighing in exaggeration. "I've no choice. I don't wanna get kicked out of the apartment."

Taeyong laughs, ruffling up Yuta's hair. "No way. You're our baby. You're stuck with us forever."

_ Forever.  _ That's the word. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Telling the rest of the group is much, much easier, though that's probably because they did not look surprised  _ at all.  _

They decide Taeil's belated birthday dinner would be a good time to come out to the rest of their friends. Taeil had already made a guess so Johnny half expected him to be proud. They'd walked into Taeil's mansionette hand in hand and the guys had glanced down at their interlocked fingers, up at them and continued on whatever they were doing before.

It's Yuta that's baffled. He pulls a shrill "You guys?? Don't you see it?" while lifting up Johnny and Taeyong's clasped hands for show, his eyes wide as he glares at them.

Jaehyun parts his lips but it's Doyoung who speaks up, "Uh, it was kind of obvious. I think we were starting to wonder when you guys are gonna tell us."

Taeyong's cheeks are flushed. Johnny loves how much he colors when in situations like this but he assures his boyfriend it's okay with a squeeze of his hand. Taeyong only smiles up at him and leans against his side.

Haechan seems to notice the color on Taeyong's cheeks because he puts on a cheeky smile as he comments, "Ice prince not so icey anymore, huh? Mr. Johnny Suh hot enough to melt even you? Wow. Incredible."

"Shut the fuck up, Haechan," Taeyong bites though the smile on his lips is enough to tell that despite the number of times he'd snapped at Haechan, he still adores the boy, and Haechan knows this.

"Are you saying I'm the only who didn't notice?" Yuta asks, incredulous. "I'm part of 95Line and I didn't notice?"

Taeil stands up to pat Yuta on his shoulder, guiding him down to take a seat. "Maybe you're used to them being the way they are with each other that you didn't notice."

Johnny pulls Taeyong with him to take the empty seats next to Yuta and he immediately helps pour a drink for them while Jaehyun snickers opposite him. He meets the younger's gaze and Jaehyun's dimpled smile widens. 

"So Taeyong thought you were into me when you were actually head over heels in love with him?" He asks.

Johnny couldn't help but laugh, "Pretty much. Funny part is that I never even mentioned your name. Yuta just made the assumption and Taeyong got mad enough he wanted to make out with Hansol out of spite."

Taeyong pinches his thigh and Johnny hisses loudly, rubbing at the spot. He frowns at his boyfriend, but Taeyong's already putting food on his plate like he hadn't done anything, an innocent little smile on his lips that he flashes at Doyoung. Their eyes speak words Johnny doesn't understand.

"So you weren't lying when you said you didn't want Jaehyun?" Doyoung asks, voice muffled while he chews on his food. "I didn't believe you when you came to talk to me."

Johnny rolls his eyes, "Why would I lie? Jaehyun's not my type."

"I'm hurt, just a little," Jaehyun winces.

Haechan scoffs, "Also because Johnny's been half in love with Taeyong for the longest fucking time. I just know it."

Heat spreads at Johnny's cheeks but he keeps his cool even as he corrects Haechan, "Not half."

He's pretty sure Taeyong's cheeks can't get any redder as the boys coo, some of them fake retching that contrasted against the smiles on their faces. Johnny laughs when Taeyong hides his blush by dipping his head low enough that he won't have to meet anyone's gaze, but his smile is bright and lively and  _ Taeyong. _

And Taeyong is Johnny's boyfriend. 

Taeyong and Johnny. Johnny and Taeyong. 

Nothing could possibly be better than this.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> title is from taylor swift's champagne problems. comments and kudos are appreciated! as always, find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/johnyongcas) or [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/johnyongclub)!


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